Is it love? - Ryan. Dangerous to Love.

Progress

Ryan's POV.

I knew that Kate's conversation with Matt won't be easy. When Matt arrived, I was a little sceptical whether Kate is ready for him or not. But Matt was determined and ready to do anything for Kate.

"I won't hurt her Ryan. I would never ever hurt her intentionally. I just wanna be next to her. I was never angry at her. Not last time,not ever. I know I hurt her by leaving but I just had to leave not to hurt her more. But I just wanna make you sure that this time I won't leave her. I need this talk with her. And to let you know I am grateful for your help and support and your love towards Kate. "

Matt was never so sincere with me before. As he went to Kate,I promised myself that I will not disturb their conversation unless Kate herself is calling for me. I started to realise that I trust Matt. I am not jealous, I don't have bad feelings towards him. He loves Kate but with that brotherly love that I love and care for my sister. And Kate deserves that love too. I would hate myself for taking Matt away from Kate because of my own stupid jealousy. It's not about jealousy but about trust. The trust that you know and believe that person you love. And as I got to know Kate better and better, I love and trust her more and more.

When Matt was with Kate,I heard her crying. But I reminded myself for my promise. I promised myself not to intervene and Matt promised me to protect Kate. So they will manage. She is telling many hurtful memories to Matt and she is dealing with the burden of not being honest with her best friend. That is huge pain. But it won't just disappear. No matter how bad state she is in, it will just get worse if she doesn't try to handle these things. We help her but she needs to accept that help. And I too suffer to see her suffer but I am not letting her push her problems away. Depression is not waiting for you to feel better. It sure doesn't. If you wanna fight it, you have to fight it when you believe that you are absolutely unable to do it. Cause it can defeat you over and over again. And the worst realisation was that Kate has depression. The one that has convinced her many times in her life to try to commit suicide.
I was not stranger to depression myself. I promised Kate to tell her about my past but it will have it's own time. Kate is not strong enough for that. I could fight my depression but it can break someone's heart just to listen as well. And her heart is broken enough. Now it's just not my time to tell her everything.
As hours passed,there were some parts what I could overhear from their conversation cause Matt got real angry when she told him that she was raped. Just as I imagined. Matt will have a hard time too. As I just thought of myself getting the 'news' that my sister was raped, my blood was boiling. I am sure Matt is feeling guilty. I would feel the same too. I am so sorry for both of them cause they go through and went through a lot together.
I had to leave for my office to have a phone call with Colin. News. Which I have to tell Kate when I will find a bearable moment for her.
It was getting late when I heard Matt coming out of our bedroom. He seemed happy and sad at the same time. We didn't really talk much now,but I thanked him for everything and as he left I immediately went in to Kate. I brought her the meds for the night and just laid next to her and hugged her tightly. I didn't wanna push her to talk. I just laid there with her showing her the support that she so needed now. She was broken but looking better. She could suffer a lot because of not being honest while honesty is the one thing that kept her alive and together.
In half an hour she was sleeping in my hands like an angel.

I had woken up 2 hours later realising that I had fallen asleep with Kate.
After I had woken up,she woke up as well.
"Sorry to wake you up baby. How are you feeling?"

I realised that she doesn't answer immediately nowadays. She thinks through everything what to say. And I can just hope that it's for the good use and she doesn't try to hide anything.
She looked sleepy and still tired,these meds do have a serious effect on her. She just buries her head into my shoulder:
"Not so good but tired of thinking about it. "