French Benefits

27/ Drunken Lullabies

* DISCLAIMER: Contains explicit language, drug use, violent references, sexual content.

Saturday · June 30, 2001 · Twin Falls, Idaho

I have since sat down with all of my band mates. I've forgiven Sam, because she isn't the one who betrayed me. She thought that Sid and I had actually ended things and had no idea. There wasn't even any kissing involved from the story she told. It just started to happen, but she couldn't stand the thought. "It wasn't what I thought it could be. It felt so fucking wrong." She told me.

"We'll make it through these times of trouble. I love you too much to let some shitty guy come between us. We've been through too much." I had told her, and we've been good ever since then.

Today, the girls and I decided we need a day out together. We haven't had much time to ourselves since Hanna and Joey had gotten practically inseparable.

We have been shopping all day and we stopped at an ice cream shop in the mall we were at to rest for a few.

"So, you and Jim are sort of close, right?" Mandy asked me out of nowhere and I laughed.

"We talk sometimes, yeah. Usually when we're alone we write music, or some other extracurricular activities... but sure." Mandy blushed and looked away.

"Oh- I see." I laughed even harder at her facial expression.

"Well, he's also not a bad lay at all. I could totally hook you two up." I winked at her and her face lit up.

"You've got it bad, don't you?" Sam exclaimed while laughing. Mandy nodded profusely.

"He's just so fucking sexy on stage and he always shoots me these looks that just drive me wild." She finished.

"Alright now, don't cream your pants right here. Save that for tonight... with Jim." She blushed again, just causing the rest of us to laugh harder.

After we left the mall, they went into a small boutique store but I went into a local hair shop – it was time for a change. My purple hair had faded to almost a silver color and it was flowing almost down to my ass.

I kept some length but added more choppy layers and decided to dye it black. I'm tired of the upkeep with other colors. As she straightened my hair I smiled.

"Looks great on you sweetheart." The lady complimented. I paid for my new 'do' and left her a nice tip.

"Thank you so much," she was shocked. I purposely went to the individually owned shops because they do better work and are a lot more appreciative of the business.

◊◊◊

We got back to the tour bus and unpacked all of our new stuff we'd picked up. Sid was still avoiding me like the plague, and thankfully even Corey kept his distance for me unless I was in a good mood.

Once I saw Jim, I grabbed his arm and pulled him off to the side.

"Feisty today, are we?" He asked as he wiggled his eyebrows at me.

"Always. But, look... I'm just going to get straight to the point. Mandy is into you. And I think you should give it a go."

Jim agreed and admitted he didn't know why he never went after her this whole time. I patted him on the back and moved along my way for more coffee.

"Your hair looks great, Ali." Corey pulled me under his arm and ruffled my hair with his other hand. I laughed, thanking him, and then we went our separate ways..