If We Ever Get an Hour Together (A Van McCann fanfiction)

Life Keeps Lapping

Lucia:

Isabel stumbled onto her bed. I helped her take her jacket off, my heart beating loudly. Was Van going to come, really? Maybe he'd just told me whatever to make me think about him. Maybe he was getting comfortable with that blonde that was all over him. 

I left Isabel snoring and wandered back toward the living room. The knocking coming from the front door was subtle, barely loud enough for me to hear. 

Van was standing outside with his hands in his jeans' pockets. "Hi." He tapped his boot against the ground, bringing his jacket close to him. My mouth went dry because I was figuring that it was all a figment of my imagination that he was even going to show up. 

I opened the door more and stood to the side, closing it after he came in. "Sit down." I waved toward the couch, but in reality, I wasn't sure what I was supposed to say or do. 

"Thanks." Van sat, looking around. "Nice rug."

"Thanks." I knew we weren't wasting time talking about home decor. "Listen, about"-

"Listen Luz, I never meant....Well I told you that already." Van leaned back. He licked his lips, pushing his hair back. "If I could change the way I...." He closed his mouth. His jaw flexed while he thought. "I thought I'd have everything laid out the way I wanted to say it...but I guess I don't."

"Do you want a drink?" 

"Do you have rum or something?" Van stood up. 

"Wine. Sugary. I know you don't like it." 

Van shrugged. "Whatever, I'll take a glass."

I brought two glasses and the bottle, and let Van pour himself. He filled up the glass and drank it like it was nothing, leaning back against the couch cushion and fiddling with his jacket still. I licked my lips, opening my mouth. "You know, I figured the next time we saw each other was going to be a bit more...badass. Like I was going to cuss you out and walk away. Not us two sharing wine in my living room." I took a large drink from my glass. The wine trailed down my chin and I wiped at it quickly, incredibly embarrassed. 

Van took another large gulp. "Who's Cody?" His tone was curious but I knew he wanted more than just friendly chatter. I'm sure he wanted to know how far I'd gone with Cody, if he'd seen me naked, and all that. 

I had more wine, feeling my limbs relax. "He's a friend." I said slowly, because obviously he was not just an acquaintance. 

"Right. They're all just friends." Van kicked the table by accident while he poured up more wine, settling back. He set his glass down on the table and took off his jacket. 

"You don't really have the right"-

"I know. I know."

I set my glass down, crossing my legs. "So who's the girl"-

"No one. Absolutely no one."

"You don't need to be friends to take her to bed," I cracked dryly. 

"You know, even if you're mad at me, I missed this. Really." Van looked me in the eye. 

"Oh don't try and get on my good side now." I looked at Van. He studied me, his mouth a straight line. "All that talk of your 'intentions' to find me. Look for me, I mean. For what? You're the one who broke up with me." The words were incredibly sour leaving my mouth. 

Van leaned back. "I broke up with you because all you did was push me away. I couldn't stand being so far away from"-

"You lived in London and I live here, do you really think we were supposed to be joined at the hip?" I struggled to maintain my voice level.