Blinded by Limerence

30 | I Promise

Morgan

As I made my way to Trevor's house, the sun set behind me, painting the sky in all shades of pinks and oranges. My curious thoughts tormented my mind once again as I pondered what the boy could possibly want. The prevalent theory, so far, was that he might confront me about Collin.

Of course, on some level, I knew what was going to happen, which is mainly the reason why I'm currently making my way to his house, but he did say he wanted to talk about something.

Arriving at his door, I gently knocked on the hardwood.

Trevor came to the door not soon after, leaning against the doorframe with what I can only say were dark, unreadable eyes.

"Morgan," he called out lowly, looking at the ground. His dark bangs hung loosely from his forehead, covering his mysterious gaze.

"T-Trevor," I replied, fiddling with my fingers nervously.

"Come in." He stepped aside for me to pass.

Head hung low, I walked in with my heart pounding against my chest. I stopped in the poorly lit living room and turned to face Trevor, who was closing the door.

"Are you alone?" I asked, suddenly curious.

"Yeah. Mom's away, brother's out." 

"Good." I swallowed a lump that had begun to form in my throat and quickly, without another thought, crossed the room (and the line, for that matter) to Trevor and cupped his warm face with my hands. Tiptoeing to reach his height, I gently pressed my lips onto his as I closed my eyes to melt into the kiss.

Trevor didn't respond, his whole body becoming stiff. Gently, he placed his hands over mine and pulled them down, away from his face. "Morgan," he ventured softly, his eyes still not meeting mine.

As soon as I realized what I had just done, I immediately pulled away, hands shaking. "I-I'm so sorry," I whispered as tears suddenly welled in my eyes. I slowly backed away from Trevor, afraid I might do something stupid again. "I... I don't know what came over me."

"You're just vulnerable right now, Morgan," he said with soft eyes, his previous dark aura now gone. "Are you alright? You really haven't been yourself lately."

Trevor and I were now on opposite sides of the room, both afraid to initiate any kind of physical contact, afraid that if we were any closer, we'd tear each other apart. 

On the verge of tears, I swallowed hard. "I'm just... exhausted. I'm so tired of being in love and getting nothing in return. I've wasted years on Archer, and now the same thing's happening to Collin..." I let out a shaky sigh. "I just..." Defeated, I stopped talking and simply let the fat tears roll down my cheeks.

Silence fell, and it was clear to me that Trevor didn't know what to do, and who could blame him? Here I was, falling apart before him. What do you do in situations like this?

"What's going on with Collin?"

"Um, I don't know if you've heard, but Collin and I crashed and burned." I chuckled bitterly. "I should've known it would never work out. Everyone said so. Oddly enough, you were the only one who didn't."

He shrugged. "I bit my tongue—I had to." 

"Why?" I asked, suddenly feeling as if I've been holding my breath all this time.

"I know you, and you would've gotten mad at me. I... I couldn't risk losing you."

My heart began to race, and my throat suddenly felt dry. I bit my lower lip and turned my gaze to the beaten up Vans I wore. "S-so... you said you wanted to talk?"