Blinded by Limerence

61 | In a Heartbeat

Morgan

I wearily threaded my way through the crowd in the reception hall. I kept my gaze on the ground, at everybody's shoes, so that nobody would feel obligated to stop me for a conversation—it was as if I had put up an invisible barrier to shut everybody out for the moment. 

Halfway across the hall, I was nearly waylaid by some older boys I've seen Trevor hang out with every now and then in school, but I picked up my pace and fixed my gaze to the floor ahead.

Reminding me too much of my junior year at Amity High, I managed to get through without anyone noticing my presence—thankfully neither Addie nor Eric had spotted me because if they had, they would've chatted me up for hours, worried that I was bottling up my feelings or something, which, frankly, I am, but all that's about to change.

"Morgan!"

Shit, I mentally cursed when I heard my name being called from across the hallway. So close...

Begrudgingly, I whirled around to see who it was who caught me in the nick of time, because if that person had called me a second later, I would've already disappeared from the hall. 

To my surprise, I saw Chase standing there at the other end of the hallway, clad in his suit and tie, holding a glass of what I'd like to think was apple juice. 

He strode across the corridor, and the closer he got, I noted how his cheeks were tinted a light shade of pink, as though embarrassed to be talking to me because he knew my do not disturb light was flickered on at the moment. 

"Er," he said, unsure. 

Uncertainly still, he reached for my shoulder but against his better judgment, hastily retracted his hand. His blush deepened when he finally mustered up the courage to say what he wanted to say. 

"I, uh, know he never actually said it to you, but... I know he loves you," he said, and just by the sheer conviction in his voice, I knew he wasn't just saying that to make me feel better, "of that I'm sure."

No names, no direct implication, but we both understood as clear as day. 

At first, I was stunned that Chase had bothered to tell me that, but now, the way he had acted so shy a few moments ago made sense.

I flashed him a warm smile that I hoped told him how much I appreciated his input. "Thank you," was all I said, then he nodded knowingly and went on his way back to the reception hall.

Hands at my sides hugging myself tightly, I stepped into the room where the service I had missed was held earlier today. 

The room was dark now, the only light source being the light coming from the adjoining rooms; it was completely abandoned, and I thought now was certainly the perfect time to have a sort of heart-to-heart with the boy, even though I knew he couldn't hear me.

Slowly, I walked down the alter to where I knew I'd find Trevor.

There was a wooden stool next to the casket, so I took a seat there, casting my gaze downward at the boy's lifeless body.

His skin was so pale now, no longer tanned. His lips were slightly parted, triggering something within me—a sudden urge to kiss his once red lips, perhaps, as though if I did, he'd come back to life and kiss me back, like in fairytales. His eyes were obviously shut, but I longed to see those emerald green eyes of his again; there wasn't ever anything as green. They once sparkled with life, and now—

It's truly a waste, I thought to myself, feeling the searing pain in my heart at simply witnessing Trevor's current state. He looked so peaceful you'd have thought he was asleep, waiting for the hours to pass before he'd climb out, yawning and stretching, asking his mom what was for breakfast.