RUN | HYUNSUNG ✔️

27

once hyunjin was back in his normal state of mind he completely ignored jisung.

and it hurt; for the both of them. it hurt that he was too scared of people coming in now to show any affection anymore.

the can that had caused his panic when he was still in his headspace sat unopened on the desk and he felt something in his heart tear every time he looked at it.

but he simply couldn't, breathing speeding up with even the thought of being close to jisung again.

even when he slept he feared someone would walk in, he feared someone would force him to do more, someone would film him again.

so he spent a lot of nights awake, he knew jisung was awake as well, his breathing irregular and his movement too often.

it had been about a week now, hyunjin dreading every second he had to be in the dorm.

he got up, walking to the door and grabbing the handle to pull it softly, making sure it was locked before going back to bed.

''can't sleep?'' jisung tried to spark up a conversation again, feeling so sad when he missed the boy so much.

hyunjin stilled on his way to his bed, frozen in the middle of the room and then moving to just stand there in a straight line. ''yeah.''

jisung shuffled back in his bed, lifting the duvet as an invite into the bed.

''we don't have to talk,'' he promised. ''just lay here with me.''

the older doubted it for a moment, he really missed the younger's body against his own, no matter which way.

and he moved to get into his own bed for a moment, raised his own duvet and patted his own pillow.

but he changed his mind; he was too weak.

in an instant he trudged over to jisung's bed, slipping in between the sheets and immediately having the younger's arms wrapping around him.

jisung always accepted him, no matter how mean he was or how long he kept avoiding him. he always welcomed him back.

even when he started crying as soon as he felt the familiar warmth heating him up and he pushed his face into jisung's chest again.

''sorry i keep abandoning you,'' he apologised. ''i-i'm really toxic, i don't know why you keep liking me.''

''you're not toxic,'' jisung denied, holding him closer. ''you're just scared, i understand.''

''i have to show you something,'' hyunjin pressed, grabbing his phone and turning down the brightness before he used it. ''a-and you can hate me after you watch it, i understand.''

he handed the device to jisung after a moment, a video ready to play and his breath quickening a little.

''w-wait,'' he stopped. ''i-it's a video of me, my ex took it when i slipped with him for the first time on accident. it explains a lot.''

jisung clicked play, hyunjin hugging into his side and watching along with him.

the younger didn't have the heart to tell him his history with the video, knowing he got upset when people mentioned seeing it.

he pulled hyunjin close against him, watching the familiar scenes play out.

once more he started watching how hyunjin followed the commands, how he did everything that was asked from him.

''god,'' jisung sighed because no matter how many times he saw it he could never stop seeing how terrible it was. ''fuck.''

the video went by fairly fast, jisung petting his hair during it and putting the device down once it was done to give him a tight hug.

''you're so-'' he hesitated. ''god, i love you.''

it turned quiet for a moment in the room, the only sounds their breathing.

''i love you too.'' hyunjin replied, easy to be missed when he said it right as some people outside started whooping.

''we have time,'' jisung said, letting him cry in his random outbursts of emotions. ''you can take all the time you need.''

hyunjin didn't say anything, his movement creating rustling and then suddenly jisung felt lips on his cheek in a soft kiss.

''that's what i can do now,'' the older whispered. ''it's what i can give you.''

''as long as you feel comfortable,'' he replied, still feeling the slight tingle on his skin as an aftershock. ''if you're happy i'm happy.''

''jisung?'' hyunjin asked, the aforementioned replying with a soft hum. ''what are we?''

''i don't know,'' jisung shrugged, honest. ''we don't have to put a label on it, we can just be hyunjin and jisung.''

''okay,'' the older replied, a smile hidden in his voice. ''hyunjin and jisung.''

''then that's who we'll be,'' he whispered, sighing sleepily and feeling happy to have hyunjin close again. ''no pressure.''

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i love garrett watts