Haikal

Bab 25

Pagi-pagi lagi, aku sudah bersedia dengan sejambak bunga dan sempat aku masak Mac N Cheese untuk dibawa ke Haikal di rumahnya. Aku pun memulakan pemanduan dan menuju terus ke rumahnya. Tiba saja di kondominium itu, aku terus menuju ke tingkat rumahnya.

Aku bunyikan loceng tiga kali tapi I shit you not dia tidak buka pintu. And I shit you not dia ada kat rumah sebab kasut yang dia selalu pakai ada kat luar pintu.

Pintu kemudiannya dibuka. Aku nampak Haikal yang masih tidak berbaju di muka pintu dengan muka sememeh yang jujurnya masih cute. I wish aku secomel itu ketika baru bangun tidur.

Belum sempat aku berkata apa-apa, dia menutup kembali pintu. Pembetulan, menghempas pintu. Yeah, that would be right. Menyedari salah aku, aku mula membawa langkahku pergi dari situ. Tapi baru hendak melangkah, aku terdengar bunyi mangga dibuka dan pintu grill dibuka.

"Where the fuck are you going?"

"You slammed the door on me, Haikal."

"I slammed the door because I was still mamai and I want to get the keys to open the damn door so you can get in. So now, entrez-vous."

Aku melangkah masuk dan biliknya itu kuat berbau lavender. Haikal is such a sucker for scented candle.

The shirtless Haikal then nyalakan rokok sebelum duduk bersandar, berbantalkan lengan di atas kerusi malas sebelah katilnya. I shit you not, that was the hottest gesture I've ever seen from a man.

"Haikal, I'm sorry."

"For?" Dia menjongket kening.

"For not understanding your condition and being a bitch towards you last night."

"Being a bitch is an understatement. You were being such an ignorant and selfish ass."

"I accept that too."

Dia ketawa. Asap rokok dihembusnya lagi ke udara. Can my eyes like, screen record this and keep it in my memories forever?

"Any else?"

"So, with a humble heart I'm asking, will you forgive me? I promise I will fix all the mess and be a better person in the upcoming."

Dia memandang tepat ke arah aku. Wajahnya serius dan jujurnya, ianya menakutkan. Teringat muka arwah Natasha Elisa berlakon jadi pontianak dalam cerita Beranak Dalam Kubur versi Malaysia tahun 1994. Obviously he has his mom's eyes.

"Kal cuma nak cakap satu je dengan Abang and I hope you'll take it with an open hand. Boleh tak Abang stop from being too self-conscious? Benda tu eating you alive tau tak? The more you care too much, negatively about yourself, the more it would affect you." Haa kau, bukan main panjang lagi dia bersyarah. "That being said, Kal selalu perasan yang Abang takut sangat bila Harraz was around. Kal faham yang Abang insecure of me with him apa semua but I'm your boyfriend, Putera. Of course I know the boundaries."

Here's an unnecessary fact; Haikal lagi muda daripada aku dan dia lebih matang daripada aku. What the fucking fuck, Putera?!

"Haikal tk nak jadi those people yang will just directly tell you to suck it up and face it like a man and telling you that we all have problems because Kal sendiri tahu the agony of being in a solitary. Kal cuma nak Abang make use of Kal and tell me anything when you are sad. I might have a bad day or not in mood but I'm always there for you. To keep you happy is what makes me happy too."

Aku mengetap bibir menahan tangis. I might be 23 years old but percayalah, deep down aku masih seorang bayi.

"Sayang..."

Dia diam.

"Abang tahu and Abang janji takkan ulang lagi."

"I hate promises sebab it's easy to make, hard to obey. I never believe in those pun, actually. Just Kal nak Abang be responsible for everything. Look..." Dia bangun dan memegang mukaku. "Is the fact that I love you tak cukup to prove anything?"

Aku pandang ke dalam mata klon Natasha Elisa itu. Mata yang warnanya sebelah lain sebelah lain itu. Mata yang menyimpan jutaan rahsia dan cerita.

"If you think you are not good enough, not handsome enough, not rich enough, or simply just not enough to be my boyfriend, just a heads up here. I rejected Niko Iskandar and I choose you."

Aku terus memeluknya rapat. Pergilah mampos dia tak mandi lagi ke apa ke! Bau busuk dia tu terapi kut bagi aku.

"Okay, you may cry..." Dia menepuk bahuku lembut. "Jangan risau, okey."

"I thought you gonna be mad at me. You blocked my number, Haikal."

"Because I was mad. Because I was devastated that it was my mom's birthday and there's nothing I can do to celebrate it. Also because I want to be in the solitude, reminiscing my mom's memories. Bukan sebab Kal bencikan Abang. I just need a time on my own."

Aku diam. Tak tahu apa yang hendak dilawan.

"In relationship, there's no 'you' or 'me'. Your problems are mine and mine are yours too. Bila ada masalah, talk it out like now. Be honest. Be transparent so tak ada yang makan hati. Block contacts tu semua to clear the atmosphere is fine. Silent treatment is the worst way to fix a problem. Abang jangan risau, I'll never do that."

"Thank you, Sayang."

Dia kembali tersenyum. Satu ciuman diberikan ke dahiku. Untunglah tinggi kan. Effortlessly je buat macam tu.

"Now, Abang duduk dulu. Kal mandi kejap. Abang bawak apa tu?"

"Mac N Cheese. Kal suka kan?"

Dia tersenyum seraya tangannya menolak rambutku ke belakang. "Semua yang Abang buat Kal suka. Duduk kejap eh?"

Aku duduk di atas katilnya sementara dia masuk ke bilik air. Aku sempat menelek gambar Natasha Elisa yang ada di sebelah katil Haikal. Mama was right. Natasha Elisa memang an exceptional beauty. Haikal inherited that.

Haikal keluar dari bilik mandi dan menyarung tank top biru gelap dan seluar paras lutut. Kami kemudiannya makan Mac N Cheese tadi bersama-sama sambil berbual tentang pelbagai perkara. Tapi hot topic of course pasal Mamanya.

"The fire tu katanya caused by short circuit. I was already asleep sebab tak salah, masa tu dah pukul satu pagi. Mama dukung Haikal then bagi kat bomba from the third floor. Dia sempat balut Haikal dengan tuala basah so that I won't feel the heat. Memang sungguh pun, takde satu pun parut melecur kat badan Haikal. But the moment Mama nak jump, the window got burned completely. Mama menyorok dalam bilik air and that's where she was found dead. Polis kata Mama meninggal sebab lemas asap as she was only burnt 30%. She also was granted a Tun Fatimah award because of her bravery selamatkan Haikal dulu and also two of her cats."

"Wow, that's an inspirational story. She really loved you, Haikal."

Haikal tersenyum kecil. "Of course, she waited for me for almost 10 years. I'm the lucky boy." Kemudian dia memandang aku. "And even luckier when I met you."

Aku cium bibirnya perlahan.

"You made me believe in love once again, Putera."
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I have to admit, it's an emotional chapter. Yalls rasa?