Abusive Love

9. True Colors

Today is my first day of online school, and I'm so excited I get to hang out with Jay all day. I didn't tell Claire about my decision because Jay says that she's toxic. Jay bought me a MacBook a few weeks ago, so that's what I'm using for school. I turned on my computer and began working.

4 1/2 hours later

I finished my work just as Jay came home. I ran downstairs to greet him but soon stopped in my tracks. He had his arm around some girl in a short skintight dress, and he was kissing on her neck. They were both drunk, I lost it. 

"Um, who the fuck is that!" I screamed.

Jay looked up and the girl giggled."Why don't you mind your damn business?" He said and led her to a room downstairs I had never been in before.

 I stood there for a few seconds and decided to go back to my room. You may be thinking I should confront him, but if he doesn't want to be with me I'm leaving. I got a bag and began packing the essentials.

Bonus Jay Pov

I had brought some bitch from the club home, I think her name was Cassandra or Carrie? I really don't give a fuck, she just was a quick fix. The bitch and I were in my office since Simone was acting like she had any say in what I do. Cassandra took off her dress and I began unbuckling my pants when I heard the front door open. The only person here was Simone, so I knew she was trying to leave. My blood began to boil and I grabbed the whore by her arm and dragged her out the room. She started screaming about how I was hurting her, but I wasn't listening. All I know is that I need to get her out and deal with Simone.

PHYSICAL/ SEXUAL ABUSE WARNING

Simone Pov

As soon as I opened the front door Jay walked out of the room with the girl. He was dragging her by her arm and she was only wearing underwear while clutching her dress to her chest. I stopped moving and Jay literally threw her out of his house and slammed the door shut before I could leave. I opened my mouth to speak, but before I could say a word Jay backhanded me causing me to fall to the ground and drop my bag. I started to lift my head and get up, but he kicked me in the stomach.

"Where did you think you were going, huh!" He screamed.

"I just assumed-" I managed to get out before he grabbed my hair and dragged me upstairs.

 I screamed every time my head hit the steps, but he didn't stop. I attempted to pry his hands away, but it just made it worse. Jay turned around, punched me square in the nose, and continued up the stairs. We finally reached the top of the stairs and let go. I immediately tried to crawl to a corner, but he grabbed my legs and dragged me back. 

"I've been way too nice to you, you need discipline," He said. 

"Jay, please stop," I said," 

I'm sorry for trying to leave it's my fault."

"I know it's your fault so now I'm gonna teach you a lesson," he said.

I whimpered and he grabbed my hair again. We entered Jay's room and he threw me on his bed. I went to the farthest corner even though I knew it wouldn't help. Jay locked the door and took off his shirt. I couldn't stop shaking as he took off all his clothes. Jay walked towards be with only his boxers on. I would never forget those grey boxers. Jay grabbed my legs, drug me down to the bottom of the bed, and began ripping off my clothes. I tried to stop his hands, but he was way stronger than me. 

"This is what happens when you think you can just leave, you're never leaving me," he said and ripped off my underwear.

I tried kicking him off, but he wouldn't budge. I could barely see because my eyes were filled with tears a begged him to stop. Here I was lying completely naked on Jay's bed about to be raped, this wasn't how I wanted to lose my virginity. I thought he loved me, and he accepted my decision of waiting until marriage.

"Your mine," he said while pulling down his boxers," I own you."

I begged him to stop one more time before he positioned himself and entered. The pain was unbearable, and he didn't even let me get accustomed to it. It was entirely about him, and he wasn't concerned about the pain I was in. He grunted in my ear and I just wanted to hide somewhere in a corner. I put my hands over my face and cried before he forcefully moved them and placed wet kisses on my neck. I felt so dirty and there was nothing I could do about it. Finally after God knows how long he came, and stopped.

"Get out, and go to your room," he said while putting on his boxers.

I almost ran out of his room and into the guest bedroom. Once I entered the room, I closed the door and broke down. I knew he would hear if I tried to go out the front door, and the window was to high up. The only thing I could do was take a shower and go to sleep. I turned on the water and got in. I lathered up my loofah and began scrubbing furiously until my skin was red and raw. I stood under the water after that for a while afraid he would be in my room when I got out, but eventually, I turned off the water. I dried off and put on an oversized hoodie and some sweatpants, and got in the bed. 

I laid there crying for a while until I heard the door open. The hallway light flooded into the room and I saw him. My muscles tensed up and pretended to be asleep hoping it would stop him from doing anything else. He turned off the hallway light and started to walk to my bed. 

He laid down next to me and said, "Turn around."

I hesitated for a few seconds and he grabbed my throat. I made a horrid gurgling noise and tried to pry his hands off.

"When will you learn to listen to me?" he asked.

He let go of my throat and I immediately turned around and faced the wall. He didn't say or do anything or do anything for a few minutes, but then he started to slide off my sweatpants. I wanted to scream and run, but his closest neighbor was miles away, and he would catch me if I ran. He pulled down his boxers and... you know the rest.

 While he was violating me he grabbed my chin, leaned into my ear, and said, "Tell me you love me."

I was shocked at his request and didn't say anything. Wrong choice. He began digging his nails into my face until he drew blood, and I couldn't take it anymore. 

"I love you, Jay, please stop," I said in a muffled tone because he was grabbing my chin and jaw.

He finally let go and finished shortly after. He pulled out, fixed my pants, and put his boxers back on. Jay grabbed my waist and pulled me closer to him. This would have been a cute gesture if it wasn't from him. I heard his snores shortly after and realized I would have to sleep in the same bed as him. I should've listened to Claire.

PHYSICAL/ SEXUAL ABUSE ENDED

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