Panchaali had never had an easy life, since the day she had been born from the holy yagn, all she has known is pain. Facing the constant abuse at the hands of her mother she feels shattered and broken, the darkness of agony that cloaks her is slowly...
"Rajkumari Draupadi why didn't you go to welcome the guests?" Sumitra asked as she entered the meadow that was not very far from palace, her eyes travelled to Rajkumari Draupadi who sat under the huge tree, her eyes were closed as Riva, the little orphan girl laid her head in the princess's lap, Panchaali's hand caressing the head of the little girl.
"Mata doesn't want me there Sumitra, she's embarrassed to introduce me as her daughter, after all how can the daughter of great queen Kritika be someone like me." She repeated her mother's words, her eyes still lay shut because she knew if she opened them there would be nothing but tears, and she feared that today she won't be able to hold back.
Sumitra's heart hurt for the little girl, her experience of this world had never been good, ever since the poor child was born out of that yagn all she got was insults and hate. Tears glazed her eyes, after so many insults too she never failed to show her kindness to others. How she did that Sumitra didn't know.
"Panchaali." She whispered as she sat beside her, Draupadi mind today was not calm, all the memories from the past, one after another played in her mind, she could still remember the day distinctly when once a servant had tried helping her, the poor thing had only helped her stand when Kirti had pushed her on the floor.
Maharani Kritika had been furious, her rage filled face still made Panchaali's heart tremble as she recalled it, she had brought the whip and had whipped the poor dasi so badly, she screamed and begged, her cries filling a silence of dread in the hearts of all the people in that palace.
Panchaali had begged her mother, pleaded to her that she let the poor woman go, she had a family to feed, a little child, but all her mother did was look at Panchaali and said the words in a very cold voice, that till today scared her to death, "This is your fault, you are the reason of her death." Her voice had been soft and there was so much hatred in it that Panchaali's heart had shattered silently.
The poor woman had died, and all Panchaali could do was watch, cry, and nothing else. Panchaali opened her eyes, they were red from tears, her heart was bleeding with guilt today as she looked at the three year old child, Riva, who was looking up at Panchaali with her little innocent eyes, she laid head in in Draupadi's lap.
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"Won't you sing today jiji?" She asked as she looked at her, Panchaali smiled, her eyes watery, today Riva lived as one of the royalties, as her little sister, Panchaali had paid a great price to give Riva this life, she had bargained with her mother, in exchange for Riva's happiness Panchaali would take every abuse quietly.
She owed that much to this little girl, her mother was whipped to death because of Panchaali, the guilt of which ate away Panchaali everyday, if it wasn't for her mother would be alive. Her heart was already in pieces by the hate of the family, the added weight of guilt of Riva's mother's death had crushed her heart in fine pieces. She felt so broken and shattered, all she could feel was darkness, a thick cloaking darkness of pain that always surrounded her.
