Louder Than Bombs

Chapter 20: Suitcase

*Somewhat unedited*

Taehyung's P.O.V

It's been a week since we visited Hwasa and got the weapons and there still was no word from Chan it was a pretty quiet week...Jungkook was out a lot with Nayeon which always gives me an uneasy feeling in my stomach but I have no place to say anything because I know what this is..just sex. He's trying to figure out some things and I will be there like the good friend I am to help him, because that's what friends do..

Right now it's about twelve in the afternoon and everybody except Jin is in the living room. Jin's suppose to stop by today to get some more of his things seeing as he can't bare to be around Namjoon, which I don't blame him for. Thinking about the situation that they're in only makes me feel bad about what me and Kook are doing because in this situation I know that Nayeon exists and I know that this would break her heart if she found out but I just can't stop myself...every time he looks at me I fall deeper into the hole of not caring. With every kiss I feel the guilt in my heart melt away, it's concerning but I try not to think about it too much.

"Taehyung can I talk to you?" I was pulled out of my thoughts by that familiar voice approaching me

It was Jimin, we hadn't talked since that day he caught me and Jungkook in the hallway. I miss him and it sucks that this whole thing is putting a strain on our relationship, so of course I nod and follow him to his room. We sit on the bed and I can tell from his posture that this was something that he needed to get off his chest.

"Tae I'm sorry that I got so upset but I need to explain why I take things like cheating very seriously. It's something that I've hinted at before but never outright said to you."

I nod and give him my undivided attention

"So a couple years back, before the mob, I dated this girl Lisa..we were together for three years and we lived together for a while too. Things were getting rocky because I ended up cheating on her multiple times, with some of her closest friends. Unfortunately I wasn't being careful enough and she caught me in bed with someone else...and Taehyung the look on her face was so heartbreaking. She moved in with one of her other friends, Jisoo, and every time she'd stop by to get some more of her things she looked worse like she wasn't eating or sleeping, I should have asked her is she was ok but I never did and....and a couple weeks later after she was suppose to get the last box of things she had, which she didn't, I got a call from Jisoo that she had...s-she had killed herself. I blame myself for that and even as time goes on I still have nightmares occasionally about that day. So when I heard about what you and JK were doing I guess old memories started resurfacing and I just went into panic mode because who knows how Nayeon would take it.."

Jimin's voice was breaking and I understand why he's so upset about everything going on

"Jiminie I know you're worried and I wish you would have told me earlier because I wouldn't have gotten so deep into this thing with Jungkook...I know that this is wrong I know that but I just can't stop myself from being with him.."

I see his face drop and instantly I feel like I screwed this up

"Taebear I love you and I know you...you're gonna get hurt, I can tell because every time Kook talks about or goes out with Nayeon your feelings are hurt and I just hope that you realize before it's too late that he will always choose her..."

I feel an uncomfortable sensation in my heart, I know I shouldn't feel anything I mean I know that he loves Nayeon, he's told me this before but that still doesn't stop the slight stinging from emerging.