My Forever - Nessa Barrett and Josh Richards

~Part 43~

A/N: i think you will all enjoy this chapter. Wait to start the song until it says too lol. Okay have fun hehe!!

NESSAS POV

"Um well last night I thought about a lot of bad things. I thought about giving up. I didn't want to deal with it anymore. I wanted to quit trying. I just couldn't handle everyone telling me to kill myself and I almost listened. That call from my mom was a push in the right direction but honestly if Darianka hadn't showed up I probably would have hurt myself. I know that I have issues and I'm gonna try and fix them. I'm trying my best." I told him.

He looked like I'd just broken his heart. "Ness I should have been here to support you like I promised I always would be. I'm so sorry I wasn't. Your amazing you know that? I don't know many people who could have dealt with what you did and still have been here right now." I let a tear slip out and he wiped it away.

"I believe in you so much and I know your gonna do amazing things no matter what happens because your strong. Because you don't give up. Because I know you'll turn that hate into somthing to keep you going. I'm so proud of you for that" he said smiling at me.

"Thank you Josh that means a lot and just know that I care about you so much still. No matter what happens" I told him. We talked for a while longer just about life and everything we've been through. "You know if I hadn't found you'd I'd probably still be making f boy tik toks and being a total douche bag to everyone" he told me.

"That would be awful i dont think I ever want to see that again" I laughed. "I missed that laugh" he said to me. "I missed having you around"

*start the song now and just let it replay lol I just think it fits*

He started to get closer and closer until the space between us closed and he kissed me. We were on my couch and he pulled away and looked at me for a second but then we kissed again. This time it didn't end. We were making out. 100%. Yeah this is happening. Fuck it.

No don't fuck it. This isn't supposed to be happening. Okay okay okay okay. I could stop it. Nah. Imma enjoy this.

We continued making out and he pulled his shirt off. Oh I missed those abs. He started to pull off my shirt and I did it for him. I was on top of him and we continued kissing and he moved to my neck and gave me a decent hickie.

Gonna need makeup for that one. I haven't done this in a while. Suddenly we were having sex on my couch. That was fast. Fuck fuck fuck. Why am I so bad at being broken up with him.

It's so hard tho. He's so hot. And sweet. And last night was awful. I deserve this right? Yeah I earned this. God why am I talking about it like It's a cookie I'm having sex with my ex boyfriend not giving myself a reward for accomplishing somthing.

Although I will say quite the reward. He picked me up and we were on my bed. Jesus this is fun. I should do this more often. What time is it? I glanced at my clock. How the hell is it 10:30. Whatever. It was over and I fell asleep cuddling him.

You know what. I'm just gonna enjoy it. Talk in the morning. Yep just go to sleep Nessa.

*next morning*

Maybe it was a dream. Maybe when I open my eyes I won't be naked. I know I'm laying with him but maybe it didn't actually happen. I opened my eyes. Nope there's my boobs. Definitely happened. I slipped out of bed him still asleep and put my underwear back on and threw on one of my sweatshirts. Who needs pants.

He started to wake up and I was sitting next to him. He looked around nervously. "I will tell you right now before you check to see if it did happen. You are still naked and yes it did" I told him a and he laughed a little. "It's not funny" I said punching him a little and drinking my coffee. "It's a little funny" he said. I rolled my eyes.