My Forever - Nessa Barrett and Josh Richards

~Part 56~

NESSAS POV

I woke up in Josh's bed. He must have moved me. I got up and walked out to find josh and Jaden sitting on the couch. "Morning" I said. "Morning" Josh told me as I walked into the kitchen. He came to help me but I put my hand up "I got it" I told him and he sat back down.

This is what I didn't want. Being treated like some fragile doll. I can take care of myself. What happened shouldn't have happened I should have been fine. I was irresponsible that's on me. I don't need people feeling bad for me.

"What the hell" I said looking out the window. "How did Fletcher find our house" Jaden said. I sighed deeply and walked outside. "Nessa where are you" I cut josh off my closing the door.

"Hey Nessa" he said. "Hi fletcher" I waved. "I'm assuming your here to ask them about me" I said and he nodded "what happens Nessa are you okay" "I'm fine I had some complications but I'm good now" I told him. He asked me some more questions I said goodbye and went back inside. "Okay all done" I said getting my breakfast out of the kitchen and sitting down.

"What did you tell him" josh said "pretty much nothing" I said eating my food. He nodded. I think Jaden senses the tension because he got up and left to go see Mads giving us a look. "Nessa what do you want me to do" he asked me. I put my plate down.

"I don't know what you mean" I told him. "I mean I love you. You know that. No matter what you say you know that. I just don't get why you can't forgive me" he said and honestly I dong know. There's just somthing telling me not to I don't really know why but there just is. "Josh I don't know I just I want to finally make the right choice. I haven't made a good choice in so long and I just really don't want to screw it up this time. I don't know what to do." I explained.

"You mom told me to show you that you can trust me again. That's what I'm gonna do" he told me and I raised my eyebrows. "Yes ma'am" he said getting up. "You wanna come to dinner at Bryce Blake and Noah's new house tonight. Cynthia and Mads are gonna be there too" he asked and I nodded. "Why not" I told him. "Perfect" he said taking me home so I could get ready.

I got home and changed Into this

And straightened my hair and did my light makeup. I was on live getting ready and everyone was asking what happened to me. They deserve to know.

"I had a really bad anxiety attack and I became unconscious and went to the hospital. While there I woke up but was still in a bad place and they put me to sleep. While asleep I had an anxiety cause seizure. I'm good now. There that's what happened. I gotta go guys love you" I said and ended my live.

I took a deep breath and drove to the house and when I walked in they had a big table set up outside with chopsticks and stuff. "I'm gonna guess we're having Chinese or Japanese?" I said and Bryce nodded "you got it kid" he said putting his arm on my head emphasizing my shortness. I laughed and rolled my eyes walking towards Cynthia Mads and Curtis.

"Hello bad bitch Nessa" Curtis said and I gave him a hug. I gave Mads and Cynthia hugs too and Curtis and Cynthia were shocked to say the least when me and Mads hugged. "We made up" I said and she laughed. "Damnit there goes my best friend" Cynthia said. I gasped "never" I said hugging her.

"So I'm here to ask the hard questions but um what are you gonna do about Josh" Curtis asked me "honestly I don't know. I mean of course I love him but I don't know what I'm supposed to do he hurt me" I said to them. "I think you should make him work for it" Cynthia said "I know you think that" I said laughing. "He feels really bad. Coming from someone who has had to listen to him complain about it" Curtis said. "Whatever makes you happy" Mads told me.

"So Cynthia wants me to make him work for it, Curtis you think he deserves a chance, and Mads you neutral" they all nodded "so we've gotten no where" I said sighing. They nodded again. "Ugh" i laid down on the couch while we talked and filmed stupid videos.

Soon it was time for us to eat dinner and we all went outside and sat down. "You kissing there's no way my old videos are the worst" Blake said. "Nah they are" Bryce said. "Bryce your are so bad" I Mads told him. "Hey joshs are the worst out of all of us" griffin said "we don't talk about that" Josh said trying to change the subject.

To make him mad me and griffin scrolled and found one of the old ones, duetted it, and posted it on my account. "I hate you both so much" josh said looking at his phone. I was laughing my ass off while him and griffin were arguing and showing the rest of us awful pictures of each other.

Josh came back to my apartment tonight because we were gonna watch a movie. We were watching radio rebel when he kissed me. I kissed him back. No I can't do this. I broke away. "Josh we can't" I told him. "Why not" he asked me confused. "Because I still don't know if I trust you" I told him standing up.

He stood up next to me. "You know what Nessa that's bull shit. You know you trust me other wise you wouldn't be here right now. I love you. I love you so much and it's like your playing with my emotions one minute you want to kiss me the next you don't want me near you. I know you confused about what you want and I know I hurt you but I just don't get why this time is different then all the other times I fucked everything up. Maybe I don't understand that but what I can promise you is that it is the last time I will ever fuck things up with you." I looked up at him and he got closer to me.

"I love you. Your the most talented, beautiful, and strong willed person I've ever met. Your an amazing girlfriend and the best friend anyone could ver ask for. You put your trust in everyone else and we the best in them and I took advantage of that. I know that. But it doesn't change that fact that you have made this the best almost year of my life since I've met you. Give me a chance not to screw up again."

My head was screaming at me to say no. To let him go. Not to let him back in again. But that was by brain trying to be smart. My heart told me he deserved another chance. One to really let him make it right. "Okay" I said and he looked shocked. He was about to question it when I kissed him. "Don't make me change my mind"

I think you can guess what happened after that.

A/N: hey guys had some trouble publishing this part! Sorry if it's a little later than normal!