WHAT IS HAPPINESS FOR US

22

"are we gonna do something fun for 30minutes?" Jaemin arch his brows.

"Does talking sounds fun?"

"Depends." Jaemin shrug his shoulders.

"If we are gonna talk about Monsta X, then I can go on for a day."

Jinwoo rolled his eyes playfully before giving Jaemin his banana milk.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Is it a about philosophy question?"

"Nope."

"Okay go on."

"Do you ever...watch yaoi???" Jinwoo avoided eye contact once he said that.

Jaemin knit his brows.

"You mean BL??? I love them! I watch Thai ones usually when I have a free time." He clapped his hands happily.
"_but don't tell anyone, especially my eomma... only Donghyun and you knew about it."

Jinwoo knew that if he ask Jaemin to explain the series he watch, it could go on for hours, heck, even days.

"Do you enjoy them?"

"Duh... it's actually really fresh to watch something new."

"And BL is fresh?"

"I find it cute."

"What thing?"

"Boy x Boy relationship." Jaemin poke a hole of the carton.

Jinwoo remained silent as he stare at the ground.

"Don't you find them disgusting?"

"No..... isn't meant love to be disgusting... although...I ever seen one viral video about two lesbian (i guess)...was it two girls one cup? Oh God THAT was pure disgusting... don't even search it up." Jaemin nearly vomit at that thought.

Jinwoo let out a small chuckle looking at Jaemin. But still, he doesn't know whether to spill out the truth or to just keep it hidden inside.

"Jinwoo hyung?"

"Hmm?"

"Can you help me? With something??"

"Sure...what is it?"

"Can you teach me how to lose weight?" He pout.

Jinwoo analysed him and knit his brows.

"Why??"

"Because...I wanna...look good."

"Losing weight doesn't automatically make you look good... besides...you already look good... infact..." Jinwoo mumbled the last few words.

"Infact???" Jaemin furrow his brows.

"Jaemin...do you trust me??"

Jaemin squint his eyes.

"Yea...why??"

"...will you trust me? Still 10 years down the road?"

"That sounds like a wedding vows but...okay I still trust you... why???"

"I have something to tell you...but first...punch me."

"Why?" Jaemin widened his eyes.

"So that you won't be able to later on."

"Your 30 minutes is nearly up...just skip to the part already you are making me anxious...I have never been this anxious since Sistar's comeback." Jaemin paused as he thought about their disbandment for a second.

While shedding a tear, he look at Jinwoo.

"Ohkay...here...erm...the thing is...I have a confession to make."

"Go on my child..."

"You see...I think... I'm in love with...you." Jinwoo said softly.

Jaemin arch his brows as he stare at the male beside him.

"..........whaaattt.....?" He blinked his eyes.

Jinwoo didn't know what to do but he sure knows that he needs to tell everything to Jaemin today. He knows that if he didn't, he won't be able to sleep tonight.

"..... I'm in love with you...and its not as friend or whatever you may think of...its...as erm...the kind of 'love' someone has for a particular being... you know???" Jinwoo rubbed his nape.

That doesn't explain anything to be honest and Jaemin still doesn't get it.

"You...like me?" Jaemin stare at him.

Jinwoo gulped nervously and nod.

"...are you serious???"

"...yea...I know you find it disgusting but--"

"No...its not that...its just...why me?" and when? and how??? What qualities do I have? My brains can't process this." Jaemin cupped his face while widening his eyes.

"I just---"

"Why me??? I'm fat and ugly and I barely have friends and really...I am worthless...unlike you... your looks are perfect, especially your height and you can get anyone you like."

"Can I get you?"

"I...but... I'm a...guy and..." Jaemin massaged his temple.

There are quite a number of things that made Jaemin flabbergasted.

Like why him?

Why a guy?

How?

And just what on earth was Jinwoo thinking?

"Is this a prank?" Jaemin tilt his head.

Jinwoo sigh heavily.

"Look...I know it sounds weird and you are probably gonna hate me but really... I'm in love with you... don't ask me why coz i don't understand my feelings as well...but what I know is that, you make me feel like the most amazing human being ever...I just love how you always made my day, care for me and never fail to cheer me up... you were the reason why I continued living in this hell hole and why I never gave up on life... because you are my pillar of strength and I know that this feeling I have for you is not normal...I love you for making me feel special...I love you for always being there for me and...I love you for your existing Jaemin...you can hate me all you want but I just want you to know that, there's someone out here who still loves you for who you are...even the whole world is against you, even if you don't feel like living, remember that I'll be here for you...and we will go through all of this together...I just wanna shower you with love coz... honestly, you deserve everything in this world..."
Jinwoo let out a sigh of relief after letting out everything that has been kept hidden inside his heart.

Jaemin on the side, could not say a word. He was rather stunned by this side of Jinwoo which he had never seen before. Somehow or rather, Jinwoo's words warm his heart

Why does those words make my heart beat rapidly?