WHAT IS HAPPINESS FOR US

32

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?!" Jaemin rushed to the male and stole his cigarettes along with the soju bottles.

Jinwoo stare at Jaemin as the male confiscate his stuff.

"...what the hell are you doing here..." Jinwoo mumbled as he rolled his eyes and grab another bottle of soju.

He wanted to drink it but Jaemin snatch it away from him.

"Why did you bring these to school?! You might get expelled if you get caught!" Jaemin look towards the entrance, making sure there's no guards at sight.

Jinwoo laid on his back and close his eyes for second. It seems that he had been drinking way too much.

And it's unhealthy because its still in the morning and Jaemin knows that Jinwoo doesn't eat breakfast yet.

Jaemin was in verge of tears looking at the male who seemed lifeless while laying on the bench.

"Jinwoo... let's go..."

"No...get away from me!" He groan all of a sudden.

Jaemin sigh heavily as he grab Jinwoo's arms.

"Let's go...you are--"

"Leave ME ALONE!" He shouted at the male.

Jinwoo got up as he sank his head on his palms.

"What's wrong with you? Why are you back to your old habits? Didn't you said you wanted to quit? We made a promise!" Jaemin stare at him intently.

Jinwoo look up at Jaemin and that was when
Jaemin realise that Jinwoo was crying.

"I didn't want to quit alright!!! I AM HAPPY WITH THE WAY I AM!!!" Jinwoo pushed Jaemin away.

Jaemin stood there silently, he knows for sure that Jinwoo is going to lash out at him. And he is ready for it.

"You told me to find a reason to quit...and I found one... IT'S YOU...I wanted to become a better person for you..." Jinwoo mumble as he wipe all the tears around his eyes.

Jaemin paused, looking at Jinwoo who has hitting his chest. Jaemin didn't know he caused so much trouble to the poor guy.

"Jinwoo I'm--"

"You...you...make me look like a bloody fool do you know that?...how could you...I LOVE AND CARE ABOUT YOU, BUT WHO ENDED UP BEING THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE HUH?! HYERIN ISN'T IT?!... I'm not angry that you like her but...why the hell didn't you tell me huh? Why you make wait for you like I'm some kind of fool? It is cause I like you? That's why you are using me? That's why you are taking advantage of me?... I...why can't you just tell me the truth?! Stop playing around with my feelings okay?!"
Jinwoo ran his fingers through his hair as he stare at the ground.

Jaemin couldn't say anything to defend himself because he knows that he is at fault.

But the thing is, Jaemin didn't mean to play around with Jinwoo's feelings. He knows for a fact that a human heart is very fragile.

He knows for a fact that Jinwoo loves him a lot but love...no matter how we look at it, can never be forced.

It's true that Jaemin do like Jinwoo as well but he still needs to be clear of his own feelings.

He doesn't want to confess to Jinwoo just for the sake of it.

He needs time to fully learn about himself before he decides to be with Jinwoo.

Unlike Jaemin, Jinwoo doesn't have anybody else to think about.

Jaemin has to think about his family and relatives.

Can his mother accept this? She doesn't even allow him to have a girlfriend in the first place. And now Jaemin likes a boy? What kind of disaster would that be?

"Jinwoo I'm really sorry if I made you feel that way but please...I never played with your feelings...I just--"

"You know what... thank you so much...--"

"No, please don't say that..."

"Thank you for the past few months of being my friend... I'm sorry if I made you feel disgusted in any way or I'm being dramatic or...I just...I have no one Jaemin...and you are my pillar of strength...my will to survive whatever kind of challenges life throws at me...you are the reason why I live...but now...I realise that...maybe I was selfish...I didn't think about your feelings so I... decided...to stop this...I won't chase after you anymore and I won't even talk to you about this... we'll just go back to how it was before...as classmates...or probably strangers..." Jinwoo quickly grab his bag pack and storm out of the rooftop, leaving Jaemin behind.