Ondreaz Lopez: Six Months with You

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Thirty-Fifth Chapter

Dear Diary,

We just got back from Playlist and it’s back to work but first vacation even though it was more of a work trip. I booked a studio for Ondreaz and I. Just a cool video idea I have. Also an excuse to hangout and work at the same time. We came up with the choreography together. 
Luna: Okay, so then it’s 1,2,3,4 and on 4 you hit down. I then demonstrated. He mirrored me and then we both did it together. 
Ondreaz: Then after that. 1,2 leg wrapped around my waist.
Luna: Two or one.
Ondreaz: Two and then spin. I shake my head and we try it.
Luna: Okay then it’s doom doom, that’s how quick the beat goes. So drop foot and turn around. 
Ondreaz: Okay let’s take it from the top. We took it from the top and he dropped me!
Luna: Ouch!
Ondreaz: Babe, I’m sorry. He helped me up.
Luna: So it’s legs then on this beat drop, okay? He shook his head. We went through the dance. 
At the end we were freestyling and I started belly dancing. Ondreaz came up behind me.
Luna: Keep up whino. He laughs. It’s time to go and on our way home, we get food. We get home and both take our showers. That’s when the thing happened, Victoria showed up.

We were cuddling when all of a sudden we received an up in tags on all of our social media. We didn’t know why. I went to the bathroom and when I came back he had watched some videos from tiktok room.
Ondreaz: Look at this, it's Victoria. She must have been pretty pissed to spread these lies about you on the internet. He shows me the videos. I look down playing with my hands.
Luna: Um, that’s not fake.
Ondreaz: What, which part of it?
Luna: Babe just listen. 
Ondreaz: Listen? Which part is a lie?
Luna: None of it but… 
Ondreaz: You did what?
Luna: It was three years ago, I’m a lot better now.
Ondreaz: Luna you punished an innocent person for your own entertainment. He got off of the bed and looked at me with anger.
Luna: I know how it sounds but it was just messed up timing and I handled it completely wrong. Just let me explain what happened. I got off of the bed and stood in front of him.
Ondreaz: Are you trying to justify what happened?
Luna: No I’m not just see it from my side.
Ondreaz: See it from hers! 
Luna: Why are you defending her?! Tears well up in my eyes.
Ondreaz: Because you are wrong Luna! I never thought you would do something so evil.
Luna: Are you judging me right now?! Do you have any idea of what I’ve been through? My tears started falling.
Ondreaz: Luna, what about her? What about what she went through? Then you pretended like you didn't know her. Made her look crazy or like a b*tch for no reason. That’s why she’s so pissed.
Luna: And I know that! I live with that every single day. 
Ondreaz: You don’t get to play victim. 
Luna: I’m not trying to excuse what I did but just… I started crying.
Luna: Please just try to understand. I reached out to touch him but he pulled away. 
Ondreaz: Luna, I’m going to sleep in my bed tonight.
Luna: Ondre, no please. Let’s just talk about this. 
Ondreaz: LUNA! He scared me a bit. He saw it and lowered his voice.
Ondreaz: I need to be away from you right now. He walked out the door and I just sat on the bed and cried. 

Avani knocked on the door and I didn’t say anything. She walked in anyway.
Avani: I saw Ondreaz and he looked pretty mad. She looked at me and I looked at her. 
Avani: What happened?
Luna: I f*cked up and it came back to bite me in the a$$. I think I just lost one of the best people in my life.
Avani: Aww honey. She closed the door, walked over to the bed, sat down and I laid my head in her lap.
Luna: I’m sorry I really am. I- I can’t. 
Avani: Sh-sh just let it all out. I cried while Avani tried to comfort me by rubbing my arm. We stayed there for a while then I lifted my head up.
Luna: Thank you Avani but I need to be alone. 
Avani: Okay, call me when you need me. I shook my head and she walked out, closing the door behind her.

Sol called right after she left. 
Sol: Hey, how are you?
Luna: Broken and in pain.
Sol: Yeah I saw the video.
Luna: You know in a way I would think that by doing so many “good things” would make up for what I did. No matter how much I changed or turned around my life. I still did what I did.
Sol: Don’t fall into that trap. We went through too much therapy, work and maturing for you to fall back in that. You messed up big time but making yourself feel guilty for all of your life is only going to hurt you more. You’re supposed to be moving forward.
Luna: It’s not that easy. She has every right to be mad and upset. I ruined her life and practically ran her out of the country. Ondreaz and I… I don’t even know if that’s a thing right now.
Sol: I’m sure Ondreaz understa….
Luna: He doesn’t know my side. He just got angry and left. Said he needed to be away from me right now. 
Sol: Right now, just give him time.
Luna: You didn’t see the way he looked at me. 
Sol: Trust me I didn’t see the way he looked at you but I’ve seen the way he looks at you. You will get through this. I wipe my eyes and shake my head.
Sol: I called you for another reason as well. Have you heard about this Covid-19.
Luna: I have and I know what you’re gonna say....
Sol: The package has already been sent and you need to stay home. Cancel all meetings, jobs, you go nowhere.
Luna: I haven’t been sick for two years now. I get the monthly check up can you please not do this?
Sol: No as king and your big brother it is my job to protect you.
Luna: I’m an adult you can’t tell me what to do.
Sol: I just did, stay home and you need to get tested every two weeks.
Luna: Compromise. Get the test but I have to go out.
Sol: Deal, with hand sanitizer and keep minimum body contact.
Luna: I promise. I kinda just want to be alone right now and figure out where to go next with everything.
Sol: Just remember deja que el fuego te guíe.
Luna: Let the fire guide you. I hung up the phone and felt the tears rim back up into my eyes.

And I started writing here. The hatred I felt when I did that is disgusting now. I can see that and I get it. I know why he’s mad he should be. I don’t know what to do diary. I just want us to be okay. The past two months with Ondreaz has been everything and I can’t lose him right now. I’ve never been in so much pain it’s like there’s this pain in my chest that I can’t get rid of. The worst part is I messed up this was all me. I did this being a stupid freaking teenager. I can’t tell you what’s going to happen with us but I hope it works out. I can’t take this pain. It’s deep in my chest and it hurts when I cry and when I try not to. I'm a mess. I don’t know what this is. I don’t care about the internet, my career or anything. The look that Ondreaz gave me before he walked out. Is a worse punishment than anyone can think of. 

It had been three days and I pretty much hadn’t left the room. I’ve talked to all of my friends and explained what happened but I told them not to tell Ondreaz, it should come from me. I needed to clear my head. I went to the spot where Ondreaz and I had our first kiss. It was the best place to clear my head and think. I got an Uber to take me to the road close by and hiked my way up. When I got there I turned off my phone. No one needed to know where I was. I wanted to truly be alone. Four hours had passed. A car came up, it was Ondreaz’s. I stood up, confused on why he was here. He got out of the car angrily slamming the door. 
Ondreaz: Everyone has been looking for you! You can’t just turn off your phone and go missing for four hours Luna!
Luna: No you don’t get to not talk to me and then yell at me!
Ondreaz: Luna get in the f*cking car.
Luna: Why do you care? You hate me! You didn’t even listen to me, not that anything I said could’ve made it any better. We’re over right, just say it. Ondreaz turned around from me and ran his hand through his hair. He turned back to me.
Ondreaz: Why would you ever think that? I don’t hate you and I definitely do not want to break up with you. Tears welled up in my eyes and I looked down. 
Luna: I just thought that you didn’t want to be with a person like me.
Ondreaz: Luna I love you. I’m in love with you and it’s not that easy to snap out of. If it was then it wouldn’t be one of the most special things in this world. When they told me you were missing all I wanted you to do was be okay. Please just come in the car.
Luna: Please listen to me. I can’t go back home like this. Not with us like this. He walked over to me and hugged me. Then he took my hand and walked me over to the car. He opened up the door and I got in. He walked around and came into the car closing the door. He called Tony.
Ondreaz: Tony I got her….. We’re not coming home right now but she’s good. He looked over at me.
Ondreaz: Yeah, love you too. He hung up the phone. 
Ondreaz: Okay tell me.
Luna: What exactly do you want to know?
Ondreaz: Why did you do it and what happened after? 
Luna: Okay, let’s take it to the beginning then.