Above you and below you (la squadra x fem!reader)

42- electric love, but y/n pulled the plug

'...whore.'

prosciuttos words stung your throat, your lips pursing as you repeated what he said to you over and over again, even as you were saving him.

'.....desperate.'

did you come off to him like that? did you make yourself out as someone as disposable as a prostitute?

'....stupid for loving you.'

someone who loved you would never call you such vulgar names, but his words sounded so.... true?

all of your overthinking caused thoughts of their own to form, forging sentences prosciutto never said in the first place to further justify your pain. it wasnt your fault, though. this was just a bad coping mechanism your body developed to help convince yourself to distance yourself.

perhaps this is what 'monique' meant when she said that the only reason [GOLDEN RULE] began to speak was because you were too comfortable in your new surroundings. this begs the question, was your stand ever supposed to speak in the first place? maybe you shouldve taken his first words as a warning to how open you were being to everyone instead of thinking of it as an accomplishment. 

"....n)!" a voice yelled, breaking through your terrible thoughts. "hey, (y/n)!"

you snapped your head up, finding ghiaccio had stopped walking and turned his head to face you. "are you alright? ive been calling your name for five minutes now!"

"yeah, im fine..."

no, you werent, but its not like you were about to tell everything you were thinking to your teammate. he didnt seem convinced anyway, but nonetheless carried on walking. "i was going to ask if... you took me seriously."

"what do you mean?"

his grip on your thighs tightened as you slid backward a bit, pulling you forward again and higher on his back. "i mean, when i told you i loved you."

you froze, pressing your lips into a flat line. "i dont believe men that say they love me when they say something stupid right before that. even if we ignore that, youve got to be at least the second person to tell me that today, so its hard to believe. come back to me with your apology food, then we can talk about what's real and what's fake."

"yes sis! make him your little house-wifey!" [GOLDEN RULE] cheered, snapping his bone fingers. "we love a man who can cook."

"we also love a man that respects women, so its a shame that they arent the same person."

"be quiet, im trying my best."

"this?" you laughed. "this is your best? what about that time at the aquarium when that weirdo started hitting on me? you seemed to be doing better then than you do now, ya know."

he sighed, "i just didnt like seeing another guy trying to make a move on you."

"well, i dont see why. he wasnt calling me vulgar names, which is what you said only you could call me."

"not true," he corrected, jumping over a fallen tree, "i said only i could yell at you, and even then i would never do that."

you sniffed the air, "...do you smell that?"

ghiaccio paused, looking around to see if he could smell what you could. "no, what is it?"

"i smell bullshit."

"-its not bullshit!" he stammered, pushing forward again. "i really would never yell at you in a degrading manner!"

in a swift attempt make him contradict himself, you pulled at his cheek, trying to annoy him enough to make him snap to prove your point. "but what if i would? what if i would yell at you and break you down to nothing but ash and bones, despite your efforts to love me?"