All details are just my opinion. I might be wrong; I might be right. I just provide A PERSPECTIVE that may help you improve your story. Kung paniniwalaan mo man o hindi, susundin mo o hindi, kaiinisan mo or hindi, ay depende na sa'yo.
Warning: The following contain word/s, phrases, sentences or paragraphs that may or may not hurt you. Please read at your own risk.
Legend:
🏅 - 👍 or ❤️
💤 - 👎
🏳️ - suggestions or corrections
Overall Score: 8/10
*Title
🏳️Daughter of Dusk and Dawn [Don't capitalize "of" & "and"]
🏅 Good choice of words
*Cover
💤 Neat and simple but not satisfying enough for the story
🏳️Try changing the background with dusk and dawn. Blend them in the middle.
[Something like this but the color palette should be bolder, not pastel.]
Oops! Ang larawang ito ay hindi sumusunod sa aming mga alituntunin sa nilalaman. Upang magpatuloy sa pag-publish, subukan itong alisin o mag-upload ng bago.
And, change the silhouette with a more detailed one – wearing a dress, a crown, a sash, holding something, whatever. The current portrayer is too generic and plain. The portrayer should seem like it is made solely for this story.
*Description
[Original]
THE BLOOD IS IN NEED OF A NEW ORDER.
Kestrel is a slave. Until she was not. Isang alok mula sa isang dekiladong lalaki ang tatanggapin niya. Ang kapalit, kinakailangan niyang magpanggap bilang si Madelaine para makalahok sa Blood Trials. Isang kompetisyon kung saan kinakailangan niyang makipagtagisan sa mga pinakamagagaling na mersinaryo sa bansa.
But as Kestrel fights for survival, evil forces are on the work. A rebellion is threatening the kingdom, and a great darkness is being awakened.
💤 Okay, it's a survival/competition type story... The provided information seems sufficient. I'm just not hooked. There's this question, "so what?" – ano ngayon kung may rebellion? What does she have to do with it? Or about it? I'm not saying you should include it in detail, but atleast hint it, vaguely if you want.
🏳️Below is an excerpt of a blurb from Hunger Games (2008).
"...Sixteen-year-old Katniss Everdeen regards it as a death sentence when she steps forward to take her sister's place in the Games. But Katniss has been close to dead before—and survival, for her, is second nature. Without really meaning to, she becomes a contender. But if she is to win, she will have to start making choices that weight survival against humanity and life against love."
