I'm my own alpha

Chapter 43

At least this time my alarm wake me up and I drag myself out of bed, I take my sloth self to my bathroom and turn on the cold water. I really need to get some pills for this headache I have. I undress myself and then put a foot in the cold water, too cold!

I turn it up making it warm and then step in, I let the water consume me getting my hair wet too. Once my body is used to the water temperature I turn it down feeling the cold water droplets beat my face like tiny painless needles.

My mind starts to wonder back to Saint and I've had enough of that, I'm so tired of feeling an empty void in me just because he's no longer around. I'm tired of the constant crashing of emotions I don't recognize overwhelm me every time I think about him, I'm tired of his absence.

The anger and frustration builds up in me and I let myself feel these two common emotions, I expect me to hurry this shower up and just rush to school wanting this daydream to end but I kinda just stand there. I feel water run down my cheeks and into the corner of my mouth, I lick my lips tasting the salty water.

Am I crying? No that's gotta be the shower water. I sob escapes my lips and I cover my mouth remembering I live in a house full of wolves with wolf hearing, yep I'm definitely crying. Well more so Nia.

She's kinda torn about the whole Saint leaving for his conference thing, I mean I am upset but she upset.

Believe it or not I get my crying ass to school and meet Tomas at my locker "Hey you," he greats me.

"Hi," I try force a smile but even I can't right now.

"How are you?" He asks as I open my locker.

"Hot, like really hot." I throw my bag in not even getting my things for my first lesson which happens to be chemistry, at least I can let this class pass by without doing anything.

To say the least the school day was as dreadful as any other without Saint, I try make it through my lessons with a clear mind but every time I try I just think about him. When the school bell announces out release I take off with Tomas and make our way back home, today marks the fourth day and Saint should be coming home.

My drive home consist of me trying not to throw up, I think I'm way to nervous in seeing him again. I pick up Bailey and Tili on the way so they don't have to take the bus. "Can we go out for ice cream before dinner?" Tili asks "Since it's so flipping hot,"

"You got money for ice cream?" Bailey asks her making me smile.

"I wasn't asking you," Tili stares Bailey down making Tomas smile. Despite their little argument I actually pull up at the nearest ice cream shop and we all get out, I lock my car behind me as we make our way to shop.

I get my normal double scoops of vanilla while Bailey and Tili decided to customize by adding toppings and different flavours, Tomas keeps it simple going with a chocolate cone and then we all sit down taking a booth.

"So now that you're mated with a alpha born," I look up at Bailey as she starts talking "does that mean we'll be accepted or do we have to like go through a trial?"

"First of all, what makes you think I'm mated with an alpha born?"

"You have a different scent wondering on you," I look over at Tomas but he just continues to lick his ice cream "now I don't know much about sex but, something definitely happened."

I let out a harsh cough that sounds like I'm chocking "What?"

"You had sex?!" Tili turns to me.

"Good luck explaining that one." Tomas says before chuckling.

"No!" I'm quick to answer "I mean, it's non of your business."

"Does mom know?" Tili questions.

"No! She doesn't nee- mhmm," I shake my head "we are not having this conversation. This-" I move my hand in a circular motion "this conversation ends here. Now. We do not talk about my sex life."

"So you admit you have one."

"Jesus Christ Bailey!" All I can hear is Tomas trying to hide his scoffs and high pitch wheezes "Cut it out." I snap at him but all I get from him is a playful smile. I got back to eating my ice cream not for a second missing the childish smiles Tomas and Bailey exchange.

Can she really smell Saint off of me? Hold up- does that mean?! My fucking parents could smell Saint off of me! Hell Saint's mother can smell her own son off of me! Great! Just great.

"Can't believe you had sex..." Tili says breaking the silence making both Tomas and Bailey burst out laughing. I just roll my eyes.

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In my body con navy blue dress I move pass a body of alphas with a baby bottle in hand and make my way to the kitchen, on my way there I pass blue balloons, blue glitter, blue banners, a blue cake and even people in different shades of blue.

The party my father wanted to host for the new baby boy is finally happening and I'm on heating the bottle duty. I enter the kitchen where all the Lunas are gathered chattering and gossiping, most of them I recognize as moms friends other I don't even know.

"Excuse me," I move past a Luna to get to the bottle warmer machine. When I get to it, I refill it up with water, plug it in then let it boil a little before putting the bottle in. The sound of joyful laughter and loud conversations ring in my ears, I can even hear the babies soft moans form the kitchen. Ding I look down but the flashing light is still red. Must be the elevator.

More guest, great.

"Nadia," I look up seeing Bailey, she's in a flowery summer dress "there's someone in your room."

"Then tell them to leave then."

"How the hell do you expect me to tell and alpha born to leave?" She uses her hands to talk.

"On behalf of Alpha Nadia, I ask you respectfully to leave her room." I say like it's the most obvious thing.

"Do you think I've tired that?"

"You know what? Imma do it myself." Ding this time when I look down it's the machine.