Fading // m.e

fifty six. - finale

last update guys - it's going to be so much longer. hope you've enjoyed :-((

xx my-second-life (haha #tbt even though I cringe I love it)

. . .

NASH'S POV

I ran my hand over her scrunched, unmade sheets; my fingers tracing along the curves and indents of the ruffled duvet still fresh with her light florally scent lingering in the air, despite the fact she hadn't been here for almost two days.

Sighing, I reached over, feeling the cold touch of the metal zip pinched in between my fingers as I pulled it shut; the lock thumping against the material as it swung quietly.

"Is this really the best decision?" Cameron asked, his voice a bare murmur as he stood behind me, the handle of Ana's carry on already in hand.

"It's the only decision right now. All I want is for her to be Analise. All I want is my sister to live, don't you see that?" I explained, feeling the frustration stir inside of me, "I don't even know if she'll make it Cam - so at this point, I swear I'm ready to take whatever there is." I finished, as I kicked at the hotel bed in frustration. I had to stay strong for her yet here I was amidst a breakdown as I packed her bags for home - 'where this could all have blown over if she's just stayed' I thought to myself. Willing myself to fight the burning sensation of holding back the tears daring to spill, I stood up, wiping my eyes with the back of my hand as Cameron looked on with sympathy.

"I can't guarantee that she will be fine, but I promise you I will do anything I can to help you. Even if it means bringing her home." He spoke quietly, clapping at my back awkwardly with a soft pat.

"I know, I know." I agreed quickly.

"She's my everything." He mumbled in quiet response; blushing once realising he spoke aloud what was clearly only meant for himself.

"She's more than only your everything. She's his too." I commented begrudgingly as I rolled out of the room, luggage trailing behind with Cameron following my lead as he wheeled his way out the suite door.

. . .

"Everything will be fine." Cameron spoke calmly despite the worry in his eyes as they flickered back to me in distress; his fingers wrapped tightly around the steering wheel of the supplied rental car and his knuckles clenched tightly to the point where they shifted a gauntly white shade.

But I couldn't help but ponder all of the 'what-it's'. The list of never ending possibilities that everything will in fact not end up fine, finally daunting on me.

"How far off are we?" I questioned as I shifted uncomfortably in my seat, my hands rested in my lap as I held them tightly between my legs to stop them from trembling.

"About two block away. Is she ready? - Have you called?"

I kept my gaze focused on the road ahead; the early hour leaving it empty and dusty white as the wind gushed with snow, blowing straight in our direction.

"Aren't you going to call her?" Cam repeated himself, looking at me as if expecting me to call her then and there - telling her that this was it. No, I wouldn't do that to her. This had to be done quickly and swiftly. Sometimes you didn't need the notice before hand - it was bad enough I warned her she was dying.

"Nothing more nothing less, you are dying." I spat at her. And it was the truth - that's what crushed me the most. As much as I had wished for it to be an exaggeration of sorts, it was far from it. It was the cold truth - written down in test results, and spoken about by doctors. Flashing on their screens, waiting to be printed and handed to those unlucky guardians.