Red vs Blue in the RWBY universe

Welcome to beacon

Sarge: Phew we made it.

The reds and blues, and future team RWBY and JNPR, collected the relics (except for the reds and blues) and made their way back to beacon. Then Ozpin announced the teams.

*Time-skip brought to you by chibi wash and chibi Ozpin having a melodramatic battle*

Ozpin: Cardin Winchester, Russel Thrush, Dove Bronzewing, and Sky Lark. You brought back the black bishop pieces. together you make, Team CRDL (cardinal) lead by... Cardin Winchester.
He says as Cardin visibly celebrates. The the team exits the stage.

Ozpin: Jaune Arc, Phyyra Nikos, Nora Valkyrie, and Lie Ren. The four of you retrieved the white rook pieces. From this day forward you will work together as, team JNPR. (juniper) *Nora jumps and hugs Ren as he passive aggressively does nothing* lead by... Jaune arc.
Everyone was surprised by this, especially Jaune.

Jaune: Huh? Led by?
He says perplexed. While everyone was congratulating him, especially Phyyra.

Ozpin: Ruby Rose, Weiss Schnee, Blake Belladonna, and Yang Xiao Long. The four of you retrieved the white night pieces. From this day forward you will work together as, team RWBY (ruby) lead by... Ruby Rose.
Everyone was equally surprised at this.

Yang: IM SO PROUND OF YOU!
She yells as she hugs Ruby, while Weiss look upset.

Ozpin: I hate to interrupt you celebration, but i need team RWBY and JNPR to follow me to my office.
He says as he and the teams go to his office.

*timeskip brought to you by chibi Tucker trying to flirt with chibi Glynda*

Teams RWBY and JNPR walk in after Ozpin to see Caboose turned around, Sarge standing over a Tucker, holding his crotch and crying, laughing, while Grif is sitting down, asleep, and a very angry Glynda scowling at tucker.

Ozpin: *sigh* Glynda, what happened.
He asks the enraged teacher.

Glynda: *still very angry* HE! *points to tucker* was talking very immaturely and inappropriately about me so I kicked him in his crotch.
She explains, a small bit calmer.

Ozpin: *to sarge* Does he do this often.
He asks referring to tucker.

Sarge/Grif: no!/yeah to every female we meet, it usually ends like this every time. Say Glynda, you wouldn't happen to be related to agent Texas would you?
He asks as all of reality starts glitching.

Author: GRIF! STOP BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL!

Grif: But I'm not it's my universe and this universe not yours. You just broke it now though.

Author: ... I see your point, resume.

*time warp brought to you by Glynda instinctively kicking Grif in the groin*

Grif: Yeah to every female we ever meet, it usually ends like this.
He says as Yang stands above tucker.

Yang: were you flirting with someone else tucker!
She says as her eyes change to red.

Tucker: *painfully* What! No, that's nonsense!
He lies though still in immense pain.

Yang looks at Glynda who shakes her head, Yang looks back at tucker even more furious and lifts her leg into the air.

Tucker: WAIT NO NO NO!
He yells as yang brings her foot down aiming at Tucker's crotch. But right before it hits Ozpin block it with his cane and takes another sip of his endless supply of coffee.

Ozpin: That will not be necessary, miss Xiao Long.
He says as yang walks back to her team mumbling.

Phyyra: So professor Ozpin, why did you call us all up here?

Ozpin: Well all of you know that, supposedly, the reds and blues come form an alternate universe, so we are asking them if they would want to become members of Beacon.
He explains as everyone looks at the reds and blues who apparently didn't pay attention to a word he said. *Ozpin clears his throat*.

Sarge: Huh oh yeah, uh simmons tell me what he said... oh right simmons isn't here, Grif tell me.
He tells Grif who is sleeping. Who then gets kicked by tucker who got up.

Grif: AH PANCAKES!!!
He screams as he falls down and the word caught Rens attention, whose eyes widened as he scoots away from Nora, who is about to explode.

Nora: PANCAKES!!! WHERE! GIVE THEM TO ME! *she pauses as she looks at everyone kinda scared of her, then she turns to Ren who shakes his head* Grif *she quietly says with immense anger* WHY WOULD YOU TELL ME PANCAKES! THE NOT GIVE ME PANCAKES! I'M GUNNA BREAK YOUR LEGS!!!
She screams while rushing at Grif while being held back by her team.

Ozpin: *sigh, to glynda* this will be annoying. *to all* AHEM! Will you, Sarge, Caboose, Grif, and Tucker like to be enrolled to beacon.
He says trying to stay calm but screaming inside. (Kinda like his alter ego wash!)

Sarge/Grif/Caboose/Tucker: sure!/as long as food is involved I'm fine/neat/with those chicks! Yeah!
They all say earning a sigh from everyone half because this conversation is over and half because their will be many more like this.

Ozpin: okay together you are team SCGT (Sargent. Best I could come up with) led by Sarge. Now team RWBY will escort you to your dorms and team JNPR you are all dismissed to go to your dorm.
He says without telling RWBY where to go.

*timeskip brought to you by constant flirting between Tucker and Yang*

Ruby: And this is your dorm.
She points to the door as Sarge pulls out his shotgun and kick the door open as caboose runs in and shoots the window on accident.

Caboose: Not my fault, somebody put a window in my way.
He says as the girls stare dumbfounded at the stupidity of the blue. Then tucker walks in carrying a presumed dead Grif then sarge comes in.

Sarge: WOW, they have everything!
He says as he points at beds. The rest of the reds and blues jump on the bed, breaking them because of the weight of the armor. Though, luckily Grif didn't jump or else he would've fallen through the floor and killed anyone who his body hit.

Tucker: I can't believe how amazing this rooms is I mean they have a bed, and another bed... and a window... and a door!
He says as the girls, except for Blake, giggle at his surprise of the beds.

Yang: What's the matter Tucker, not used to having a bed? Shame.
She says mocking him.

Tucker: No it's just normally I sleep with a giant rock out in the middle of a box canyon... *the girls look confused* well I couldn't stand sleeping with a Caboose in the room *thats me!* shut up, so I needed to leave it was really hot and sweaty, bow chicka bow wow, but I managed.
He says proudly.

After a bit more talking the girls went back to their dorm and the reds and blues had to call Glynda to fix their beds which she did, then they jumped on them and broke them again. So she fixed them again, then they slowly climbed on and fell asleep while Grif was still passed out.