A Second Chance.

Chapter 5.

*NOTE*
*This chapter includes mature content*

~Jo~

Hero looks at me and says "Maybe we should talk first, before we do this" .

This is a conversation I'm not sure I want, but I know we need to have.

Last time we had a serious talk like this, I was the one who initiated it and have been regretting it.

~Flashback~
~January 2020~
~Jo~

Hero is my bedroom packing his case, he is due to leave for the airport in just over a hour. He's been here visiting me for the past 2 weeks but has to go back to London for work. 

I've loved having him here with me. I always love spending time with him especially when it's not connected to 'After'. It's always so much simpler when work isn't involved.

I hate this part, the part where we say our goodbyes. It'll be at least 2 months until we next see each other. Living so far apart is beginning to take it toll.

We knew it would be difficult having a long distance relationship but it's something we both wanted to make a go of. But I don't know how much more my heart can take. I know I love him but I can't help feeling this way.

"Hero, we need to talk"

"Sure babe, what's a matter" he says turning to me.

"I can't do this anymore"

He looks at me, full of confusion. "Can't do what, anymore?"

"This, Us" I say waving my hands back and forth between us

"What" his voice breaks, as he says the word.

He takes a step towards me and takes my hands. I shake them off and a take a step back.

"Jo, why are saying this. Have I done some wrong?" He asks his voice full of concern.

"No, no. I......I just can't keep doing this. It's just how I feel. I love you so much Hero. It's due to the amount of love that I have for you, that each time we leave each other, it breaks my heart that little bit more and I don't know how much more my heart can take"

He walks over to me. "But we knew this was how's it was going to be for awhile. Especially while you have work commitments here and I have them in the uk"

"I know. I'm sorry. I just can't...."  I say, with each word quieter than the last.

Hero takes my hand again. "Please don't do this" he begs me. "Jo, I love you so much and I want to be with you. I'd be with you everyday, if I could" he says pleading with me.

"I know. It's just. I can't. I'm sorry" I say with tears streaming down my face.

"Jo" he pleads, his eyes starting to fill with water.

"I'm sorry" I say, my voice faltering. 

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~Jo~

I shake the rest of that memory from my thoughts. I don't want to remember that conversation, that day, or the days that followed.

I had a few dark days after that day. But it was  my friends who helped me out of the hole that I was digging myself deeper into.

I couldn't stop crying whilst on the phone to Mia one day and she said to me "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened".

I'll never forget that saying. I was always happy with Hero and she knew how happy he made me. I still smile now, when I remember time we spent together.

I start walking over to the window. "Ok" I simply say.

~Hero~

I follow Jo to the window, she turns and I take her hand.

"I just wanna know that if we do this, that we're on the same page. Is this just sex or is this something more?" I ask.

She looks at her feet and softly says  "I never stopped loving you Hero. Im sorry for what I said to you that day. I was stupid and I've regretted it ever since" 

She then looks at me, her eyes shining bluey-grey. I used to get lost in those eyes.

"Why didn't you say something?"  I say holding her gaze.

"I don't know. I was going to and then when we next spoke, you said you wanted to be friends. So I thought that's all you wanted to be, to just be friends.  I was so glad that we still had our friendship. I never wanted you out of my life or lose your friendship. Then you told me you meet someone and I excepted that we were over"

As she finishes speaking, a tear rolls down her cheek. I reach up and wipe the tear away with my thumb.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry for not putting up more of a fight, I shouldn't of let you go so easily, I should of....."

As I'm talking she interrupts me "I'm the one who's sorry. My feelings for you never changed, I never stopped loving you Hero"

I place my hands either side of her face and kiss her passionately. I want her now and I know she wants me.

We start making our way over to the bed. Kissing and undressing each other. She lifts off my T-shirt and throws it down to the ground. I unbutton her dress, she slides out of it and it falls to floor.

She unbuttons my jeans and slides them down. I take off my trainers and step out of my jeans and boxers.

She climbs onto the bed and takes off her bra. I kneel on to the bed, straddle her and hover over her, momentarily, taking all of her in.

I then lean down, I rub my nose against hers and then kiss her again, our tongues intertwining.

I continue kissing her, working my way from her lips, to her neck, to her breasts and then her stomach. I pause just above her panties for a moment and I slowly remove her panties.

I climb off the end of the bed and walk into the bathroom and pull out a condom out of my washbag. I walk back over to the bed and put it on.

I climb up the bed and up her body, kissing her body as I go. When we're face to face, she wraps her arms under my arms and pulls me closer and opens her legs wider.

She impatiently kisses me and I slide myself into her. I start off slowly, moving in and out of her. I watch her, as her body reacts to my movements.

As I pick up the pace, her breathing quickens and she moans my name. Her legs tighten around me and she digs her nails into my back, as we both reach our climax.

I kiss her and roll off of her. I lay on my back, beside her. She turns on her side and places her head on my shoulder and her arm across my chest.  I wrap my arm around her and kiss her forehead.

As she lays in my arms, I smell her hair and I think to myself 'Wow I've missed this'. But most of all, I missed her.

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Thanks for reading 5th chapter!

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