So What If I Love You (Eren x Levi)

Wrong question

Authors note for the next two chapters: This will most likely be the hardest chapters to read through..keep in mind Levi is 19 and Eren is 18..a sex scene will be coming up but it will not be a romantic or smutty one.  Its to escape reality for Eren, thats how he decides to cope with the depression phase atm also suicidal attempt will be in the next chapter. I recommend reading it, its not that bad but if its too much you can skip.

Also as I did at the beginning, I told u all I would recommend reading while listening to the song you by petite biscuit because thats how I wrote the entire story, however I wrote the next two chapters while listening to train wreck slowed by James Arthur.

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He started to kiss my neck. It sent shivers down my spine, I was reacting more sensitive than usual.

"Maybe talking would be better", Levi asked unsure as he held himself back. "No. What I want is to be held", what made us humans feel like this I wondered. Levi was hesitant and I kissed him again "Please", I pleaded.

His fingers ran up my back as we kissed passionately. Slowly I lost myself and surrendered to his touch. I rocked my hips as he groaned into the kiss pulling me closer thrusting his hips upwards.

I unbuttoned his pants and his cock sprang out hard as wood. I started to stroke his cock, he pulled back "Fuck", I was so focused on him I didn't notice him putting his hands into my boxers. "Look babe, it feels even better rubbing them together", the slight dominance I had disappeared as he took over and we rubbed our cocks together.

"C-cumming", he started moving his hand faster and I came into his hand. Somehow it made me feel bad. He already laid me onto my back and spread my legs apart.

"What- no. That place is dir-", he bit into my thigh shutting me up as he looked at my hole. I felt embarrassed, he suddenly touched it and I jumped. "Its fine, trust me", his finger crept into my hole and it felt weird, like a random object being stuck into there.

"I can't do this without preparation, wait for me", he got up and went into a room. He came back with a bottle and condoms. It was lube, he knelt back in front of me and poured lube onto his fingers. Then again he placed those two fingers into me.

"Le-levi..its feels weird", I cried and I felt the hunger in his eyes as he looked at me. Intense, it made me feel warm inside. I tried anal fingering a few times to prepare myself for this but its never felt this good.

His fingers felt so long and thick, suddenly he came upon a spot and my back slouched up. "Not there", I whimpered and he grinned. "Found it", his fingers started thrusting faster and he repeatedly hit the same spot, it felt so good I came again.

Levi licked it off my stomach "I think I can enter. Are you sure you want this?", I nodded "Just put it in me already", he slowly started to enter me. "Breathe Yeager, this takes time", it hurt but every time I winced he'd take it out and retry.

Finally he entered all the way and started moving slowly. It was already too overwhelming for me. The thoughts disappeared and my brain was turned to mush. He started thrusting into me faster and my nails dug into his back as strange noises kept coming out of me.

He fucked me doggy next and my face was smushed into the couch as my ass was up. I could feel him in my stomach. "Ngh~ s-so fast", he put his hands on my waist and rammed it into me as hard as he could. I felt tears of pleasure coming down my cheeks as I wanted more and more.

It didn't take long for Levi to come after I had already came four times. He pulled out knotting the third condom we had used.

He pulled my boxers back on and his own. He wiped my sweat down with tissues. "Are you okay", I sat on the couch as he sat back down handing me a water bottle. I think that was maybe the wrong question. I wasn't sure what the right one would've been.

Even though his touch made me happy, even though he made me feel like I was his absolute world, tears streamed down my face. I was incapable of being okay.

"Eren", his soft worried voice ringed in my ears. "I'm so disgusting, I've dirtied you", I sobbed. Levi froze unsure how to handle the sudden break down. I grabbed the tissues desperately trying to clean him of the impurities I carried.

My self hatred grew larger and larger. I couldn't breathe, the air was getting thin. I felt like I was in a box. "EREN", he grabbed hold of my wrists and I stopped altogether.

"You could never dirty me, please don't think that", he kissed my forehead and got up to get me a tissue.

I blew my nose and stopped crying, silently just sitting on the couch.