Catch Me Before I Fall (A Phanfiction)

Chapter 22

*Dan's POV*

School was over, Peter wanted to hang out but I was feeling it today but he wouldn't take no for an answer. I just wanted to go home and be left alone. It was almost 5 pm I was walking home when my phone buzzed, its probably Peter or my mum "hey..where are you?" It was Phil, I thought he didn't want to talk to me "uh, I'm on my way home.." I texted back and waiting for his response "Ok good, same. I need to talk to you." What does he need to talk about, I thought he didn't want to speak to me, I was actually really nervous. I rushed home and waited for Phil, dad had a meeting today and mum was going to be home within an hour, that leaves us with enough time to talk, I just hope whatever it is will be good news.

The door opened 5 minutes later and I heard footsteps up the stairs and a knock at my bedroom door it was Phil. "Hey" he said quietly, "Hey, uh come in" I said awkwardly, he sat opposite to me on my bed "So what did you want to talk about?" I asked him, he didn't look at me "I-Im sorry for everything I said to you, I was out of line" his voice was shaky, I put my hand on Phil's knee "Its okay, you were hurt" I said quietly. "I just want to make sure you knew that I didn't mean it" I nodded my head "I..I tried to jump off a bridge" my heart dropped, I felt like someone stabbed me in the chest "W-why?" I was trying my best not to cry, why would Phil do that "Because I want to die Dan, I would've done it but your dad found me" Thank god for Dad. "But why Phil? Why do you want to die so bad" my voice was getting shaky, Phil looked at me "Everyone would be better without me Dan" I stared at him "I wouldn't Phil, how could you think that.." He just looked at me, he leaned in and kissed me softly and quick, I missed that but I wish it was a better situation "Dan I've gotten too many people dragged into this situation, I hurt so many people, Peter got shot because of me" Phil had tears in his eyes too now. "Ben shot Peter, he got shot saving me, its not your fault" I reassured him "But you cut because of me, I know it" I was lost for words "I didn't know how to react Phil, it was dumb of me I shouldn't have done that" he wouldn't even look at me "I'm better off dead Dan, please" he was crying now, I wiped his tears away and held his face in my hands "I won't let you, you have me Phil, I want you alive and happy Phil" I was crying too now "Dan, I'm not happy, what's the point in you trying" those words stung a lot, I didn't know what to say, I stood up and wiped my tears away, I heard the front door open it was probably mum "Um I'm going to go help mum with dinner" I said before heading downstairs.

*Phil's POV*

I blew it again, I tried fixing things but I never say the right thing. I went up to my room and decided to try to do homework, what's the point when I won't be around much longer, I was up in my room for about an hour and a half when Dan's mum called me down for dinner. I went down stairs "Where's Mr. Howell?" I asked "He's still in the meeting dear, also there's an update the police might be close to tracking Ben. But let's not talk about that its not a good dinner conversation" she smiled and I gave her a small smile back. She asked me about my session and how I felt "it went okay  and I feel okay" I lied, well the truth was it went okay but I didn't feel okay. After dinner I helped clean up and Dan's dad had come home, everyone was in bed by 10. I layed in bed awake, I couldn't sleep all I could think about what how badly I wanted to die but then I'd start thinking about Dan and how I couldn't do that to him, but I needed to he will be better off without me. I kept tossing and turning I couldn't take it anymore so I got out of bed and quietly walked to Dan's room, he was still awake his side table light was on, maybe this was a bad idea I quietly moved back "Phil?" Dan got up "Sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you..I-I couldn't sleep" I said, Dan stared at me "Come here" he said and I walked up and layed down, he layed down next to me I looked at him "I-Im really sorry Dan, I keep hurting you, I should've just died" I sighed "Stop saying that please, you dying would just break me Phil" he said softly with tears in his eyes "Dan, when I finally end it, I want you to move on, I don't want you being sad" I wiped his tears away "You don't get it do you, I can't live without you Phil, I wouldn't be able to move on I'd be practically dead" he sobbed "Sshh babe, don't cry" I stroked his cheek "I-I love you so much Phil, I was torn when we weren't talking, I don't know what I'll do without you" it hurt me to see Dan this way "We're talking now, its okay" I wrapped my arms around him "Listen to what we're talking about Phil, please, I can't live without you" what is about Dan that makes me want to back off of this, makes me want to stay alive, he really wouldn't be okay without me, I don't know what to do anymore "P-please don't leave me P-phil" he sobbed quietly, I leaned over and kissed him passionately he kissed me back I put my hand on his cheek and wiped his tears away, I really missed kissing and loving him "P-please, I love you" he said and I held him close "I'm here Dan, I love you too" I want to die but I just couldn't do that to Dan. I kissed his forehead and turned his side lamp off, I held him close as we drifted off to sleep.

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Surprise! We decided to post twice today! Enjoy :)