A Bump On The Road (Jaden Smith Fanfic) (Wattys 2015)

Chapter 45: Drunk On Love

I was the last one downstairs since Mom and Vanessa already went to bed, and Richard, Nate and Cassie had gone back home. I switched off the kitchen light after I'd taken a few pills to lessen the morning sickness and was about to go towards the staircase, until I heard talking coming directly from the front porch. Almost like they were saying my name.

"Stella..." The slurred voice said again and it seemed to become more recognisable but I mean, it couldn't be. Not at this time and why would he just stay on the porch? I gradually opened up the door, looked to the ground and saw Jaden leaning against the wall - barely being able to stay upright and keep his eyes open. Please tell me that he's not drunk.

"What are you doing here?" I loudly whispered at him and he struggled to stand up on his own two feet.

"I need...I need to talk to you" He finally stood but leant his arm against the door frame for balance. The closer he came, the stronger the smell of the alcohol became.

"Are you drunk?" I asked as I attempted to wave off the smell.

"...maybe" Jaden sniggered like this was some type of joke then suddenly brushed past me to come inside.

"You can't be here. Especially not like this. You need to leave," I said while following his every movement towards the kitchen, where he managed to switch on the light and sit on the island chair.

I stood opposite him on the other side of the counter. He wasn't speaking. Just staring blankly without giving me eye contact, so I took this as a chance to examine his whole state. His white, button-up shirt had its sleeves rolled up to his elbows, the top few buttons were undone, his dark curls were scruffy and his caramel-complexed skin looked paler.

"I miss you, Stella" He randomly came out with. "I miss us,".

Wait, what?

Jaden stared up at me, waiting for my reaction but I couldn't even bring myself to present one. "Look at me. I need you. I-I love you..." His voice was hoarse and raspy, like a cry was straining against his throat. It was lower but still seemed to remain soft.

I shook my head because this couldn't be him talking. He's not making any sense. "You're drunk. You don't know what you're saying, J".

"No. You know that I love you, Stell. Even if I don't show it. I know you do" He continued to whisper and I started to become lost for words. "Just say that you know I love you"

"Jaden..."

"Please," He pleaded, his voice sounding desperate like a child's. This was a side of Jaden that I've never seen. When we fight, he apologises with the sorry's and the hugs, but it never comes to this level where I feel like this is all my fault and all I want to do is walk over to him and whisper in his ear that it'll all be okay. But why is he doing all of this today when we haven't spoken for almost four weeks now? "Stella-"

"I know that you love me J," My sight started to become blurry with the tears forming in my eyes, and refusing to drop down my cheeks. "I know that I mean a lot to you. I know that you never mean to hurt me but I forgot that sometimes. I can't help it. When I'm crying over you, a voice always tells me that you don't give a two fucks about me and if you did, I wouldn't feel like this is a reoccurring cycle in our relationship," I couldn't help but constantly sniff to hold the tears back in before I ended up breaking down in front of him.

"So you don't miss me?" He said and I managed to capture a tear rolling down his cheek.

"How could you even say that?" I cried. "Of course, I miss you. It feels like fucking hell to miss you all the time. I waste so much time on you and give you chances after chances and even when we're just friends, you still manage to hurt me as bad. I never dated Christian when were 17, I broke up with Austin weeks ago but for what? Not because they didn't treated me right but because all I could think about what being with you, no one else. So don't you dare assume that I don't miss you when this is all your fault!".