A Bump On The Road (Jaden Smith Fanfic) (Wattys 2015)

Chapter 36: One Less Chance

Jaden's POV -

I rubbed my thumb against Stella's soft, clear skin. Our lips centimetres away until Stella suddenly sighed and moved her face aside, distracting the moment.

"I want this to happen okay. You know I do. But if...if Andrea was still here, would this still be happening?" She questioned but I just shrugged since I wasn't even sure what the real answer is. Stella stepped back at my response, while shaking her head and sat back down on the bed.

I chuckled. "Does it matter, though?".

"Well to me, yes because I'm not just someone's second option, Jaden".

I frowned at her words. "Second option? I''ve always put you first, Stella. No matter what"

"Really? So, when I went to that ultrasound alone that was because you, "put me first"?" Stella complained.

"I said I was sorry, I overslept. But this isn't even about that, this about you and me, why do we always need to bring up the past?" I said, reaching forward to a hold of her hands, although she sadly pulled away.

"Because I saw the way you looked at Andrea, J. I saw how much she made you smile and I saw how heartbroken you were when she left, and i'm sorry if that was my fault but I can't do this if she is on your mind too". 

I kept quiet, unknown of what to respond with and scratched the back of my head. Yes, I sort of loved Andrea and she's one of the most amazing people that I've met, and I'm not gonna deny that she's still on my mind right now, but Stella should know by now that she's the only person that I ever constantly think about.

"Is she?" Stella demandly asked.

"Well kinda, yeah," I finally spoke. "That's because she's just left but i'll get over it,".

"See the thing is, you're saying that now but you can't possibly tell me that if she came back right now, you would hesitate to take her back because the way you looked at her...was the way you used to look at me,". 

I paced around and walked towards the window, leaning against the sill as the room filled with silence. "For fuck sake, why are you always doubting us, Stella?" I quietly said with my back to her.

"I'm not doubting, I just-"

I hastily turned around and yelled. "Yes, you are!".

"I'm just tryna make a point, I'm trying to make the future a little more clear than it used to be!" 

"What? Because you think I'd cheat again?" My voice quietened down again as I spoke, all these memories of years ago coming into mind.

"No..." Stella replied with her head down.

"You still don't even trust me, do you? We're fucking meant to be together! Not many guys would even go for a girl who's already pregnant any ways," I looked straight at Stella as soon as those last words escaped my mouth. The hurt and disappointment in her eyes instantly made me regret it. "Okay I didn't...I didn't mean-".

"No! Carry on!" She yelled, her eyes filling up. "Well I'm sorry that I'm pregnant with your child, but don't you dare come in here and try to make me believe that i need you because I don't okay. I'm perfectly fine without you and if being with me is only for the benefit of the situation, not because you genuinely love or care about me, then you can go fuck yourself for all I care," She didn't hesitate to get up off the bed and head towards the door.

"Stella, you know that that's not true," She paused with her hand on the handle. "But if you walk out that door then I'm done, because we've wasted so many chances to fix everything between us,".