Be Still My Heart

About Last Night

Y/N POV-

Wanda went back to her room before we both fell asleep leaving me feeling empty. I always seem to sleep better with someone else in the bed. I have never liked being alone. The nightmares seem to stay away with someone next to me, someone who I for that moment don't have to worry about because they are in my arms.

I slowly stumble into the bathroom to brush my teeth before crawling into my bed. I grab the folder Stark gave me and flip it open. I mumble only to myself, "Y/N Josette Haven, I haven't heard that full name in a while." I run my fingers across the typed out name before continuing down the page.

The first page just covers generic information like my birthday and where I was born. There is a list of all of the schools I have attended and my home address, the make and model of my car, and license plate. All surface level tracking could find.

I flip through a couple more sheets of generic information about my parents like the location of their graves, what hospital they died at, the days they died. It is all still a little too fresh in my mind though.

I close the folder and place it back down on the side table. I turn the nightstand light off and settle down in the bed, my eyes on the ceiling. My fingers run along the fabric of the comforter slowly grabbing and releasing it. I flip onto my side and move my arm under the pillow. I bring my other hand up to clutch the side of the bed. Maybe tonight, I will be able to sleep. And then again, maybe not.

I wake up drenched in sweat with my heart racing before the sun has even risen. 4:30 am. Four and a half hours of sleep about? Better than normal. I unstick the comforter from my skin and move to my closet to change.

The gauze bandage is peeling off my skin when I remove my shirt. I thankfully didn't reopen the wounds again thrashing about in my sleep but they aren't completely healed yet. They should be by tonight. "No fighting today I guess." I apply more antibiotic and pain relief cream before putting on a new bandage.

I sit down on the edge of my bed and lace up my shoes. A run will help calm my mind. I pull the sheets off the bed and grab the folder off my nightstand before leaving my room.

No one else is awake yet as I quietly move down the hallway towards the laundry room. I throw the sheets in and start the washer. Thankfully, it is on the other side of the house because the beeps from the machine seem so loud this morning.

I make my way down the stairs and into the training room. I click on only the lights that illuminate the track. I set the folder down on the bench by the lockers and begin unraveling my headphones.

It is peaceful in here. There are barely any walls, mostly windows. Even the ceiling has skylight after skylight installed. It almost feels like I am going for a run outside, almost.

I walk over to the thermostat and drop the temperature a couple degrees. It already is slightly chilly in here but I appreciate the colder weather. I click on my phone and plug in my headphones. I do a couple stretches for my legs and hips as I scroll through my music. "Ah, perfect." I click into the song and take off running.

Wanda POV-

Seven o'clock rolls around, and my body's natural alarm wakes me up like usual. I don't even really remember coming back to my room last night. I could have just stayed with Y/N; I don't know why I didn't.

Y/N. Last night. Wow. I roll out of my bed and walk into my bathroom. The first thing I see is the mild bruising along my collarbone and lower neck. Hickies. Fuck, Y/N. She definitely knew what she was doing.

I change into a hoodie to attempt to hide my neck and black skinny jeans. She probably can heal these without causing pain to herself, that or I need to find a metal whisk.

I walk out of my room and notice Y/N's open door. "Y/N?" I pop my head inside to see the bed striped and her nowhere to be found. Where did she go?

I can hear talking in the living room and kitchen but none of the voices are Y/N. "Hey guys," Steve and Nat are talking across the kitchen counter. They have empty plates in front of them from breakfast.

"Good morning," Nat takes a sip of her coffee as I look around the room and down the nearby hallways as discreetly as possible. "She is in the training room." Steve and Nat both have stupid grins on their faces. I lightly shake my head and roll my eyes as I walk away from them to hide the smile on my face.

I step out onto the balcony walkway that looks down on the training room. I hear the rhythmic hit of shoes on the track before I see her. I get ready to call out her name but her headphones are in and I can hear the volume is loud from here.

I walk down the stairs and wait inside the doorframe until she sees me. It takes her a second but she slows down and takes her headphones out as I step into the room. She presses a couple buttons on her watch before looking back up at me. Her eyes, they have deep bags underneath them and they are a dark greyish blue color this morning.

"Hey," a small smile forms on her face before disappearing again. I follow her over to the bench for her to grab her water. She sits with her legs spreading the bench as I sit down next to her, my knees facing towards the lockers. "How long have you been running?" She shrugs her shoulders before looking back down at her watch.

"Y/N," she refuses to really look at me. "Talk to me." I scoot closer on the bench and place my hand on her leg. "Um, I ran about two hours." She places her hand on top of mine and slowly interlocks our fingers.

She wasn't like this yesterday. She's distant now, and the contact doesn't seem to be helping. Her breathing is finally leveling out as she looks down at her phone.

I have to ask; I have to know. "Do, do you regret last night?" Her head shoots up at my question. "What? No, no of course not." She scoots the rest of the way closer and wraps her free hand around my waist pulling me closer. "Then why are you so distant right now?"

It seems to dawn on her that her behavior is weird. "I just, had some rough nightmares. Um, I got up around 4:30 and have been running since five. It is not you, or last night. We're okay. I am just a little shaken up."

I nod my head acknowledging the issue. "Do you want to talk about it?" She shakes her head no. "Maybe later, right now I need a shower." I squirm out of her grip and push away slightly. "Yeah, you do. You're all sweaty." I can't hide the smile on my face. She doesn't regret last night.

"How rude," I stand up off the bench and fake like I am going to walk away until Y/N begins to run after me. "Hey! Y/N, no!" I am laughing the whole time as she chases me across the floor until she corners me. She spreads her arms out and charges the rest of the way forward catching me.

"You're all sweatyyy!" She spins me around in her arms laughing. "You didn't seem to mind not even five minutes ago." She puts me back down on the ground but keeps me close. "You needed comforting." Y/N laughs lightly as she looks at me. Her face is super close again.

"Um, not to ruin this moment but," I lift my hand up to my neck and pull back my hoodie to reveal the hickies. "Can you heal these? Only if they aren't going to hurt you." Y/N gently lifts her fingers to my neck then proceeds to carefully inspect the marks. "Man, I did a good job."

I give her a quick shove back. "Seriously, Y/N? Heal these. I don't want everyone else seeing them, and I can't keep my hoodie on all day." Her smile turns into a fake pout as she steps closer to me. "You want me to make my art disappear?"

She can't hold the pout long, her smile is back almost immediately. I place my hand on her chest between us, drawing her eyes down. "No, I want you to move them to your body for me to find later." Her eyebrows raise as she looks back up at me. "Yes ma'am and bruises like this don't hurt. Just so you know."

I hold back my hoodie as Y/N places her fingers back on my neck. There is a small bit of light then she pulls her fingers off. "There, you can find them later." She winks at me then kisses my forehead leaving me in bit of a daze. "I'll see you later." Y/N grabs her water, headphones, and the folder then walks out of the room leaving me in a daze.