It has been two years since Vienne and Ava finally and peacefully got the love they think they can start with and embraced it as much as their hearts can, but things are so unpredictable to call it like that.
A very strange feeling is about to envel...
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Halos hindi ako nakatulog sa kaiisip kung bakit agad-agad nakilala o lumutang si Tyron. If I am not mistaken ay after pa namin grumaduate at makapagtrabaho nang kalahating taon bago nakilala ni Ava si Tyron.
Napasabunot ako sa buhok ko sa inis pero agad ko rin itong binitawan at napatingala sa kisame ng kwarto ko. This is too much for me. Ang akala ko ay pwede kong maiwasan ang ganito habang maaga, ang akala ko ay pansamantalang ligtas na ako kahit papaano sa sakit na dulot nilang dalawa, but why? Why did he come up as early on this time, bakit pati ang fourth year college ko na masaya ngayon ay parang binabawi?
May nagawa ba akong masama para bumaliktad ang panahon na pati ang pagpabor sa akin ay mabawi? I hug my pillow and burry face on it sa inis pero hindi lang inis kundi inis na gusto kong maiyak. I just want to be okay again so badly kaya naman hindi ko mapigilang magtampo sa mga nangyayari. This is so unfair, specially to me.
Within few hours ay may klase na ako kaya kahit na mukha akong basahan ay pinilit ko paring mag-ayos ng sarili ko para pumasok. you're going to be fine pagharap ko sa sarili ko sa salamin talking to myself but I didn't notice na nakatingin na ako sa salamin nang matagal with all my frustrations still kaya napayuko ako ay naiyak.
How can things be better this time if it is not going with the way I want it? It is automatically refraining me to change it. I look pathetically stupid leaning my forehead on the mirror as my only thing to lean on. I am battling this with myself alone. It is like a train wreck feeling. Miski si Yana na gusto kong masandalan ay parang feeling ko ay 'di ko na magawa. This is just me. Me alone.
Hindi ko alam kung papaano ako makakapasok sa klase, second day pa lang at di pa nagsisimula ay parang exhausted na ako at dahil duon ay walang ibang sumagi sa isip ko kundi ang isang tao. She doesn't deserve to be like a second choice but I feel like I have no choice either. I called her and dropped the call as soon as we stop talking.
"Sorry kung naistorbo kita." I said with pity and shame pagkapasok ko sa kotse nya.
Yes, I don't think I am in the mood nor energy to even drive my own car. I quickly and frustratedly lean on the headrest closing my eyes.
"You're not bothering me, Vienne. I mean what I said that I am here for you. Bakit di ka na lang magskip ng class kung 'di maganda mood mo?" tanong sa akin ni Camille on the driver's seat looking at me concerned.
I told her I am okay and I signaled her to just drive. Yes, I called Camille to fetch me. Nakakahiya man pero sya lang yung comfortable akong tawagan and just couple of minutes ay nakarating narin kami sa North Carrison University.
Camille and I walked towards the campus and as usual some eyes were on us. Karamihan ay sanay na pero karamihan rin ay pilit kaming binibigyan ng issue. Kung 'di ko lang mahal si Ava ay malamang napunta na ako kay Camille or Harvie and speaking of Harvie ay nakasalubong namin sya papasok.
