Divorced // bang yongguk (#26)

사십 오

Yongguk

"I need you back in my life, I mean it." I looked up at Han Yiyeong, my heart is hurting so much as I said it and I have never thought that I would be so desperate. "And not as my babysitter but as someone really important to me, Han Yiyeong. I can do anything for you if you return to my side, I could help you find a job and get out of unemployment right away as soon as you stay with me and make me feel normal again."

I am not the type of person to ever plead with anyone for anything, I never go down on my knees for anything that I wanted, everything went my way ever since I got married to the mother of my children, my life was like a dream come true for me. I go to work looking clean and fresh, I spend all those hours cooped up at work and I come back home to the apartment still looking the same and my ex-wife putting my children to bed, I never had to worry about anything much and I brought food to the family with any many problems.

It was like that for almost 2 decades until my ex-wife decided that it was hopeless staying with me in this relationship and she decided to leave me entirely, not even bringing the kids along with me as she starts a new life without me included but with a guy that would make her happier than I do. I realized for the first time that I had relied on my ex-wife for everything that I had in my life and I couldn't cope with the sudden workload and house chores that I was faced with after the divorce was finalized, I had to do everything on my own and it was so hard for me because I have never actually done it on my own and I sucked at it so much.

The apartment smelled so bad all the time but I don't have the time to make it neat, I don't have the time to talk to the kids and I don't even know what half of them are doing most of the time except for Sehyun who is my youngest but I have managed to lose him a couple of times. The only thing that I am good at is being a good CEO and that is not what I wanted, all I want is to have a balance in my life and I don't have it.

Until Han Yiyeong appeared in my life and helped me to get my life together and manage my life and my children a little better, I have never felt so relieved in such a long time. With her around, I can work without any issues of my children not going to work and communicating with each other.

I don't want to admit that I only treat Han Yiyeong as the person who will take care of my life for me, but she is everything that I needed for my answer. I don't want to fall in love with someone who makes me happy, I want to have someone who can make my life happy and my children would love her as well, I want a motherly figure in the family and that person is Han Yiyeong.

She looked at me for the longest minute, not saying anything to me and just processing everything that I have said to her. I indeed want her in my life but I also want her to do whatever she wants to do in her life, she is struggling to find a job so I am going to find a job for her, getting her out of unemployment and she would be able to make her mother at ease because she would not have to worry about paying bills on time and Han Yiyeong will be staying with me.

There is a lot of good things that I will be giving her if she helps me with my life again, and I will be helping her with her life as well. Of course, there is a possibility that she wouldn't want that because I am a decade older than her and I can be considered to be her uncle more than anything else.

"Give me a few days to think it over, Mr Bang. For now, you need to pay more attention to your children especially Sena who is your most rebellious child. She just got out of the hospital right?" She asked me and I nodded my head. "She is like that at her age but with a little more attention, you will be able to communicate better with her and she wouldn't try to hide more secrets with you."

"Thank you for helping me out with my life," I said to her.

"If there is nothing, I can go back right?" I nodded my head and she takes her to leave.

I got up from my seat to open the door for her but I suddenly felt so dizzy and I stumbled a little, that little sound is enough for her to turn around and support me before I would collapse. "Are you alright?" She asked me as she helps me to the couch and I sat down, feeling so restless and she put a hand to my forehead. "You're having a high fever, don't you know that?"

I didn't know that I was running a high fever, I have been caught up with work for the past week that I stayed up all night and went back and forth from home and work, and the small incident of me almost losing my youngest son was the last straw for me. And now I have fallen ill and Han Yiyeong saw everything, I feel so embarrassed to collapse in front of her.

"You have to get to the hospital immediately, you will die if you don't go right now--" She was running around panicking and I grabbed her hand, pulling me into my arms. "Just stay with me and I will be fine, Han Yiyeong..."