Divorced // bang yongguk (#26)

사십

Yiyeong

In the past 25 years of my life, I have lived a very ordinary life and a life that has no much ups or downs. I had decent grades throughout my middle school and high school life and I managed to get into the course of my choice, from there I met a guy who is as ordinary as me and then I dated him for the next 5 years and we did nothing much as a couple, nothing progressed between us and it was really that the relationship has to come to an end and he was the one who initiated the breakup.

And I was glad that he did break up with me or I am going to live an ordinary married life with him and have children who will also grow up to be ordinary people as well, I figured out that I don't want to waste my time just living a very boring life but I don't expect to turn out to be like this.

Being in the arms of my boss is not something that I have expected when I decided to work for him, I was told that I would only have to take care of his children right from the moment he goes to work till he gets off work in the evening and I would get paid handsomely as well because I will not be taking care of one child but three children ranging from the ages 4 to 17 but I have not expected things to escalate like this.

No matter how much I try to push him away but he continues to kiss me as if he has been waiting for this moment for the longest time, it is as if he is only using me because he missed his ex-wife but I am not his ex-wife, I can never be his ex-wife and I am only going to be his babysitter and nothing else. Our relationship will be like that and nothing else, it is wrong for us to be in a relationship with my boss and with a divorced man with 3 children.

With that thought on my mind, I finally managed to push him away and I slapped him on his right cheek. "What do you think that you are doing, Mr Bang? This is wrong, you can't do this to me."

He looked shocked and he held both of my hands. "Han Yiyeong, I can explain--" I pointed towards the door. "Get out of here when I still have the respect for you as my boss and as a divorced man with 3 children, I will not go back on my words and I will be moving out of here so that I will finally be able to cut off my ties with you and your family. Good luck finding a babysitter who works well with you and your children, I wish you all the best." I told him.

He looked at me for a few more seconds, as if he is trying to plead for forgiveness and he nodded his head, agreeing on my words. "If that is what you want, I will respect your decision and not come to your house ever again. You will receive your final payment by the end of this week."

And he left, I immediately collapsed on the floor and I couldn't feel my legs anymore. I can't believe that I have just declared that I don't want to have anything that I want to do from the guy that I have started to fall for, it seems kind of ridiculous but I have been attracted to Bang Yongguk ever since the first time I met him on the streets.

I knew how charming he could be but never have I known that he would be this charming, he has everything in his life, he has a successful career and he is even the CEO of his company when he was only 25 years old and he has been managing his company well for the past 10 years, he has 3 lovely children who looked really good looking thanks to his genes and most importantly he had a heart of gold and is thoughtful of everyone even though he spends most of his time at work but it is because he wants to bring a great future for his children in time to come.

But he has one thing that he doesn't and he is lacking a lot in it, he hasn't been lucky in the department of love ever since his wife left him for someone younger than him, SeJeong told me that their mother has been cheating in their relationship even since SeJeong was in elementary school and SeHyun was their last hope for their marriage to work but it still didn't turn out well and they got divorced.

For a whole year, Bang Yongguk just buried himself in more and more work and eventually became a workaholic that isn't there for his children all the time, neglecting everything in his life. And then I appeared in his life and he hired me as a babysitter to take care of his children, at that time I was very grateful that he got me out of unemployment and I could earn some money while searching for a real job but I have started falling for him even more day after day and now I have completely fallen in love with him.

When he kissed me earlier, I was surprised at that kiss and part of me wished that it didn't happen, it just made things even more awkward and irreversible and I have no idea how to appear as if I am not affected by that kiss. Why did he even kiss me for?

He could be just missing his wife a lot but I doubt that it is the case, he has become like me and he likes me as much as I like him and it is not wrong. A babysitter should not fall in love with her employer no matter what happens and a kiss is all it takes to ruin the entire relationship and I am going to end this thing before it gets worse. I am going to leave this place as far as possible and stay anew in a place that I don't know much about it but at least I don't have to face Bang Yongguk and his children every single morning, I will be a free woman at last.