Untouchable face

38.

Seeing Meredith had somehow energized Derek. After therapy, he had been exhausted and had just wanted to go home and sleep. But then he had seen her from across the hall, had hugged her, had smelled that amazing flowery smell he realized he had missed so much, and the exhaustion had disappeared. He suddenly felt like he could do anything. He actually felt better than he had since he got home. He wasn't sure exactly what that said and he wasn't sure he even wanted to think about it all that much, his head was enough of a mess already. But it had been exactly what he needed to realize he really needed to get back to living again.

Meredith, in all of her rambling and giggling and soft advice, had made him realize that it was time to get up and get moving. His cast was off, standing hurt like a bitch and he wasn't even sure his body remembered how to walk, but it was progress. This was all about progress and he wasn't going to sit at home, depressed and pissed. He would never get out of whatever this funk was if he just stayed still. Right now he didn't exactly know what he needed to change but he couldn't figure that out just sitting at home and feeling sorry for himself. At least forcing himself to get back on his feet might be enough to help him figure his head out. The lack of clarity was the worst part of this. He had always had clarity in his life, always knew what he wanted and how he wanted it. So this felt impossible right now. Except for when he was around Meredith. When he was with Meredith, his brain cleared and things just felt...he couldn't give a word to the feeling. A word would change everything.

He just knew it felt really good. It felt amazing to sit with Meredith and he still had the feeling that he could say just about anything to her and it would be okay, she would understand. They weren't exactly the same, they had grown up entirely differently and yet she always seemed to understand him. She helped him see things differently and that was why he wanted to get her a thank you present. She had done so much for him, kept doing so much for him and he needed to do something for her. Maggie wanted to go for lunch, and he thought that was a great idea, but he wanted to get Meredith a great present. He had no idea what exactly would be a good present for her. She wasn't a typical girl that would appreciate certain things and she was more than just a doctor that deserved a quick thoughtless gift. She had pulled him through a lot and she really needed something special.

"Where do you want to eat?" Maggie asked from her spot in the driver seat.

"I...I'm not quite sure," he shrugged. "What are you in the mood for?"

"It's up to you, hun," she smiled. "You worked your ass off today. And you got your cast off."

"I did," he grinned.

"So it's totally up to you."

"I...actually..." he breathed. "Could we stop at the store and give me time to think about it?"

"At the store?" Maggie frowned.

"We never got Meredith a thank you gift."

"Oh," she nodded slowly. "We didn't."

"I realized it today and felt like an ass," he sighed.

"We did promise her a thank you gift."

"We did."

"We can do that," Maggie nodded. "Do you want to stop at Bath and Body Works and get her a basket of soaps and lotions?"

"A basket of soaps and lotions?" he frowned.

"Yeah, bubble bath and stuff. It's a great thank you gift."

"It's...what you get someone you don't know."

"And?" Maggie sighed.

"Meredith helped me a hell of a lot more than she had to."

"I know she did, Derek," Maggie nodded. "But she's still just your doctor. How well do you know her?"