Untouchable face

70.

Meredith wasn't quite sure how she had ended up here. A few months ago, she had been the person who didn't have anyone. She was really bad with families and wasn't the girl any guy would bring home. Except Derek loved bringing her home. She hadn't given Derek's family much thought when she had first started dating him. She knew them but they had all been so close to Maggie that even thinking about them had been terrifying and she definitely hadn't considered how big of part of Derek's life they were. But they were his world. Derek's family was the Hallmark movie she had dreamt of when she was younger. They had been through bad but had always rallied around each other and helped. The bad times didn't make anyone run, they made the Shepherds closer.

It was amazing and she knew Derek wanted her to be part of it, which actually kind of felt more amazing. A little scary, but amazing. If she wasn't working, he expected her to come along for the weekly dinner like it was the most natural thing in the world. They scared her though. Weekly dinners were for bright and shiny families, not dark and twisty girls who drank far too much tequila. Carolyn was a fantastic cook, and the food was to die for. But it was scary and today was going to be really scary.

Derek had been really quiet the night before, really quiet. Until she had made him talk and he had admitted that today was the anniversary of the day his dad had died. It had been a long time ago, a really long time ago, his younger sisters didn't even remember it, but that kind of pain didn't go away. She knew it had been tough for him all those years ago and she knew it was a difficult day for all the Shepherds. And now she was going to be apart of it for them. She wasn't sure she was able to do this.

She had really considered telling Derek she had to work it. He couldn't argue with that, neither could his family, she knew the sisters missed sometimes because of that. It would be a million times easier. Except Derek had looked so vulnerable and sad when he told her. He had been awesome with her when she had freaked out and then had been totally there for when she had talked about her mom. He was an amazing boyfriend and he deserved an amazing supportive girlfriend.

So she was going to do this. It was terrifying and she wasn't even sure if the family would want her around for this but Derek did and she was going to remember that was all that mattered. Derek needed her and she'd just be brave or something. Derek was her boyfriend and she really, really loved him. It still felt crazy in her head but she wanted to think she could do this. She had wanted to be with him and that meant things. It meant they were a team. It had taken her a bit to figure that one out but since their talk in the woods, things had gotten really good between them. Their nights together just flowed and the odd days they had together was amazing. So she needed to keep being part of his team.

"You okay?" she breathed as she squeezed his hand. They were at the stop sign before his mom's house and he was just staring ahead.

"I...yeah, I think so," he whispered.

"I'm here," she nodded. "I'm here and...we're a team."

"We are," he smiled slightly.

"And I love you."

"I love you too."

"Good," she murmured as she moved her hand to play with the curls at the back of his neck.

"Hmmmm..." he breathed.

"I know it's hard but...relax," she whispered. "It's okay."

"I know it is," he nodded.

"Just...thinking?"

"Yeah," he sighed. "Just...hard day."

"I know."

"But glad you're with me."

"You are?"

"Of course, Mer. You...make things better."