Camera Shy

C- 25 - Once you see into their soul, both hearts shine brighter.

My afternoon is spent mostly with the band, Joey and Hazel. Though I do get some time with Reece, our moments are mostly with the others around and are filled with accidental touches and stolen looks.

When the food is served, I feel mortified that everyone has brought a dish to share except the band and I, who rely on Reece, who never bothers to bring anything. Every dish has a story connected to it and every dish must be tasted. I am an extremely plain and boring eater but despite that I manage to try a few of the dishes and enjoy them.

We all sit and eat whilst listening to the memories created in this house. There are some hysterical sing-a-longs, mostly to the guy's music, and a few other random tunes.

As the sun begins to fade, guests begin to leave and Reece finally takes my hand and sneaks me away indoors.

"Come on, time for a tour of my home," he gives me a flirty smile, "We will start upstairs."

I place my hand over my heart.

"I'm shocked." I say jokingly.

"Are you questioning my motives? That I would sneak you away from all those people downstairs to have my wicked way with you?"

I stop him with a gentle kiss. "Yes, I am suggesting that."

"Well, any other time I'd say you were absolutely correct; however, my room isn't up here anymore." He says smugly.

"Aww you lost your room, huh?"

"I gave it up. My mama wanted to keep it but then that would have been one less child she could love, so we came up with a new solution, but that's downstairs. So first, my old room."

He opens the door to reveal a pink room with lots of fairy lights.

"Obviously they never bothered to redecorate." He chuckles.

"The room next door is where I found my sister kissing some school mate called Rick. I grabbed him and scared him away." He says proudly.

"Nice." I grin.

"And this spot, right here between our rooms, is where Hazel came home mad that he dumped her and kicked me hard in the shin. Hurt like hell. I don't recommend making her angry." He gives me a pained look.

As we make our way around the house, he fills the tour with little secrets and memories that cause me to constantly smile.

"So downstairs is just my space and the lounge. Let's start in the lounge."

He heads straight for the wall full of certificates and photographs. He tells me about every person in the pictures with such pride and love that I start to feel my eyes getting watery. He stops mid-sentence and cups my face.

"What's wrong?" He says, gazing into my eyes with his own worried ones.

"It's this whole day... You are so loved and adored by your family and it's so clear how much you love them back. It makes me wonder how different my life could have been, you know. I have family that I haven't seen in such a long time and I know I wonder about them, so it must break my mum." I sniff and wipe my eyes.

"Your family are missing you too. I guarantee it." He says comfortingly.

I place my hands over his, pull him closer and kiss him. It's only when I hear voices close by that I pull back and smile.

"You know what sucks? You are correct, I'm surrounded by love and I've never needed more than that. I knew I was adopted and I thought I'd accepted that, but once we got famous, the papers dug around in my past and I struggled with the fact that my face is out there, so why didn't the family that gave me up reach out to me? Surely my bloodline has seen my face or heard my voice and wondered about me? It massively messed with my head. I turned to support groups to try to wrap my head around why, at one month old, I wasn't good enough for my birth family. I met Chloe online and we talked for ages and when we finally decided to meet for a coffee, she acted like she'd never heard of our band. She said her parents died after she was born so she couldn't fully understand how I felt, but she'd never leave me because we had a connection nobody would ever understand." He sighs as he sits on the edge of the sofa.