Falling Unexpectedly [Completed]

28: A Sense of Regret

Love Hurts by Lil Tjay^

I was sitting on top of my car, looking at all the cars going by as I was on top of this hill. I was looking down at the town below as I was thinking about all of this stupid shit.

Blake crossed the line on trying to get me to talk when I didn't want to. She was forcing me to talk to her and it was as if it wasn't her doing all of that.

She was someone different and I saw that in an instant when she wouldn't leave me alone.

I don't know what her problem was but I'm glad I told her what I said.

I hate her.

I hate my dad.

I hated my life.

I wish mom was back or I was with her.

This life isn't made for me and I'm struggling everyday, fighting to survive when I'm ready to give up.

It was hard and getting harder everyday.

I didn't know what to do anymore.

I was ready to leave.

I'm so close to graduating but dropping out was looking a lot better right now.

Drop out.

Leave town.

Move far away and start a new life.

That sounds nice.

But it wasn't in my cards.

I wanted to succeed and not take the easy road.

I sighed as I brought my knees up, looking at all the cars driving by. I smiled as I was at peace with myself as I looked around and everything started fading away.

Looking around, I took my phone out and saw that I didn't have any service. I smiled at that before placing my phone down and looked down at the town below me.

It looked as if everything was tiny and I was bigger than anything in the world.

Sitting up this high makes you feel empowered and I loved it.

It was a feeling of something I couldn't explain but power was definitely there.

This town was something I never wanted to grow up on. I remember I used to like it cause I was young and everything was a lot bigger for me but as I grew up, I noticed that it was just me who thought that.

The town was small.

Too small.

I hated it.

As I was sitting up here, looking at everything, I noticed that it was not even tweny miles each way.

That's how small it was.

I held my hand up and my thumb out with my index finger as I held the town in between my fingers and crushed it.

Sighing, I laid back on my car and stared at the sky. I saw that the sun was going behind some clouds and they were dark.

It looked like rain clouds, which didn't bother me. If it rains then it rains and I'll continue to stay here.

I kept looking up at the sky and saw how the sun was still behind the clouds. It looked like it was going to rain and I prayed it did.

"Come on, rain. Rain!" I yelled. "Rain! Ah!" I screamed when my phone scared the shit out of me. "Stupid phone. I picked it up and saw dad calling.

I declined it.

I sat there for a few moments until my phone started ringing and when I picked it up, I saw dad trying to call me again.

Rolling my eyes, I declined it again before looking around. I didn't want to go back home yet and I knew Blake had told dad that I left.

I didn't care anymore.

I will stay here for however long it takes for me to forget everything that's wrong with my life.

-

After a few hours, it was now around ten at night and I was heading back to the house. I wanted to get in and leave before anyone starts any shit.

Cause I as officially done with this bullshit.

I wasn't going to stay there and get treated the way I was.

I had all the right to leave.

Nobody could stop me.

After I parked in the yard, not the garage, I got out and walked towards the front door. I walked inside before walking to the stairs and hearing someone ask who just walked in.

Ignored them, I walked upstairs to my room. I bent down beside my bed, grabbing the safe and pulling it out.

I opened it, seeing all the money I had saved over the years. I smiled before placing the safe on the bed then grabbing a suitcase from my closet and walked to my dresser.

As I was tossing clothes in, I saw Blake walk in my room without knocking. I stared at her before continuing packing my clothes up as she walked towards me.

"Reagan."

"Leave me alone."

She stood there, staring at me for a moment. "What are you doing?"

"I'm leaving. Tell dad."

"You're not leaving."

"I am." I look over at her. "And you nor he can stop me."

She kept watching me as I was packing my clothes, tossing a lot of shit in the suitcase. I look over as she reaches over and grabs a shirt that I was about to put in.

"Reagan, stop."

"Let go." I pulled my arm back as I stared at her. "Go away."

"Reagan.. I'm sorry." She softly said.

Looking at her, I placed another shirt in the suitcase. "Too late. I'm not staying here and getting treated like this."

After a few moments of placing clothes in the suitcase, I saw Blake reach over before grabbing my arm and pulling me towards her. I tried pushing her away and she held on and hugged me tightly.

"I'm so sorry."

I stood there, not doing anything until I patted her back. "Ok." I pull back and look at her before looking away. "I'm just going to-"

She grabs my face, pulling me towards her and gently kissing me. I stood there letting her kiss me until she pulls me and looks at me.

I furrow my eyebrows then saw her lean back towards me and pressed her lips against mine. I gently grabbed her arms as I was caught off guard and didn't know what to do.

When she pulls back, she stares at me as her hands were still on my cheeks. I stared at her as she sighs before releasing my face then I heard dad's voice from downstairs.

"I'm up here!" She yells before looking at me then walking out of the room.

I stood there for a moment until dad walks in then pulls me into a hug. I was still shocked so I didn't hug him back and barely heard what he said when he was talking to me.

"Reagan, I'm sorry." He kept going on about being sorry and apologizing. "Do you understand?"

"What?" I said as I look at him.

"I'll get better. We'll get better as a family. I promise." He pulls me into a hug and I stared at the wall wondering what the fuck was about to happen next.