Redemption

chapter 51

CHAPTER 51

HOLLAND’S P.O.V

I sat there in the dark living room, not bothering to switch on the lights. Pada mulanya saya sangka Selena masih dalam bilik dia, tapi rupanya bilik dia pun gelap dan kosong.

Mana dia pergi?

Saya sip on my brandy calmly, then I inhaled and puffed out the smoke with the same calmness. Mata saya menatap kosong pada kepulan asap rokok depan saya, namun bayangan wajah Selena yang mendominasi minda saya. Senyuman tulus dia, kekecewaan dan kesakitan di mata dia. Saya menekan dada saya.

Kenapa sesak dada saya ni? Kenapa lagi tiba-tiba saya terasa dada saya tertikam melihat kekecewaan dan kesakitan yang jelas terpancar di mata Selena? Apakah perasaan saya ni? Hol, kau sudah tau yang perasaan kau terhadap Selena sudah lebih dari sekadar nafsu.

Saya teringat tadi pagi saya duduk tersandar di daun pintu bilik Selena mendengar sayup-sayup tangisan dia, tanpa sedar air mata saya turut mengalir. Entah kenapa tangisan Selena sangat pilu sehingga saya turut terkesan menitiskan air mata.

-Flashback-

I can’t think about myself saja. Lantas saya mengesat air mata saya dan berdiri meninggalkan lantai atas.

I prepared her breakfast.

“You look like shit, bro” SYDNEY.

Astaga, bukan dia kerja kah? Kenapa dia di dapur dorang, shirtless dan sedang menikmati what looks like a mug of coffee?

“Bukan kau kerja kah?” saya tanya sambil mengerutkan dahi.

“I own the firm.” Ciss! lagi-lagi dia mau kasi ingat saya. “And it seems like my client and her prosecutor is obstructing my work.”

Oh.

Sydney menaikkan satu kudou.
“What’s the point of working today kalau subject yang perlu saya jumpa sedang kesiokkan di rumah dibaham asmara.”

Dibaham asmara? Sydney’s getting weird with his speech these days sejak banyak trial dia yang dikendalikan dalam BM. Tsk tsk.

“So, I decided to…” dia menyeringai. “match my brother’s sex drive instead of working.”

UH?!

Sydney turned to leave and I saw scratches on his back! Punya sundal!

Sudah saya siap masak, saya membawa naik the fried rice and orange juice that I’ve prepared for Selena. Saya tau walau saya ketuk separuh mati pun dia tidak akan buka pintu.

My last resort, I took the spare room keys and unlocked her door.

Saya meletakkan the food and drink on the bedside table, then I sat at the bedside. Selena’s sleeping on her tummy facing the opposite side. Her hair covered her face. Saya nampak kesan lembapan atas bantal.

Saya menghela nafas berat. Tangan saya tidak terkawal, I caressed Selena’s cheek, sambil merapikan rambut dia yang menutupi wajah dia. I can feel the traces of tears against cheek. Hati saya bagaikan dicucuk jarum yang sangat tajam. Sakit.

Fuck! Terasa my d*ck start to get hard. Selena’s wearing a black lingerie that I remembered so well. The edges of the lingerie ternaik menampakkan her round smooth ass. Saya tidak sedar wajah saya semakin mendekat to her ass, hampir I stick out my tongue to lick her ass cheek. But she stirred in her sleep and it made me realize this is not the best timing to lash out my lust on her.

I lifted my head, only to bowed down and kiss her forehead gently.

I walked out of her room, locking it like she did earlier.