Chapter 35

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Liza pov

One question. One simple question. Five words, ten seconds to say, one punctuation. You'd think the answer would be simple right? Wrong.

A question that should be the easiest in the world to answer left me in emotional turmoil. Any sane person would already know their answer. Right? And the million dollar question in play. Are you gonna press charges?

I could sit there and think over that question all day. Do I want to press charges? I mean the most logical thing would be to say yes, go to court, and get him sent down for what he did. But it's not as simple as that.

No. Of course it's not, it never truly is. Agreeing to press charges would mean I have to see him again. Face him again. Knowing what he did to me, looking him dead in the eye and having to explain to a bunch of strangers what he did to me is terrifying.

I'm already dealing with so much on the social media side of things. My parents aren't the only thing out there for me to have to clarify now. Despite the way I act around friends, I had managed to keep my party life hidden away from tiktok. And then I'd have to explain to them why I'm not pressing charges if that's what I decide. Oh god, I can already hear the comments.

"Think about all the other girls you'll be allowing to get raped just like you."

"She's clearly doing this for attention if she's not pressing charges."

"Only cowards can't face their attackers."

"Think about the innocent women who will suffer the same fate because you're pathetic."

I mean, I get where they'd be coming from. Everything is true. But why don't people ever think about it from my perspective? Loads of women do take their attackers to court. Loads of women do get to see their rapists go down for what they did. But what if I can't?

What if I can't see him again?

What if I stumble on my words and the jury think it's fabricated?

What if I go to court and they find him innocent anyway?

All of it would go to waste. All of that mental strain that I'd have to put myself through, just to see him not go down. I don't think I'd be able to cope if he didn't go down for what he did to me. I can't go through with that.

But what about the other women? What if I can stop him from doing it? How many people could I be saving? Am I strong enough to do it? Could I be? Do I want to?

"I don't know." I finally answered, breaking the silence.

Going over and over all the different scenarios in my head doesn't make things any better. I didn't know what to do. I was stuck. I didn't really know where to go.

"Jamie Bush was his name right?" Landon asked, getting out his phone.

"Uh, yeah." Jaden responded seeing how I was still not that responsive.

Digging. He's going to try and do some digging. No. Don't do that. He's going to try and find out if other people have been a victim of his. I don't want him to find out. Stop digging.

Tell him!

"What the fuck?" He stated out loud. Oh god no.

"What is it?" Jaden asked.

"This guy. He's a veteran. He used to serve in the war but he got discharged. He's got over fifteen accusations of rape or sexual assault to his name." Fuck sake.

If this guy was a veteran of course the court will always be on his side. It's useless! I can't go to court. I can't press charges. I just- I can't.

"That's so fucked. And to think, those are just the accusations. How many others could there be?" Jaden mumbled, still looking through the phone. Just fucking stop it!

"I really don't want to think about that. But we can build a case. We can get him out behind bars. For good." Landon sounded determined to take him to court.

"This is true. Maybe we can try and talk to some other girls, see if they'd be willing to stand up against him too and may-"

"Oh just fucking stop it." I snapped, finally being able to find my voice. "Just stop alright? I'm not taking him to fucking court. I don't want to take him to court." I stated, gritting my teeth as the emotions started to bubble.

"Woah, Liza. Calm down a little. Don't stress yourself about this. We can get you a good legal team, we can find people who are going to fight your case. He's gonna go down for this." Landon tried to assure.

My head started going funny. The stress of overthinking every little thing was starting to take control. I can't. I won't. I don't want to. I need air.

Breathe you fucking idiot.

"Landon. Stop talking. She needs help." Jaden instructed, walking over and pressing the back of his hand against my forehead. "Liza? Liza can you hear me?" He was becoming blurry. The sound of his fingers snapping in front of my face echoed around my brain over a million times, as if it was hollow.

I couldn't see properly. I could breathe properly. Every breath I took felt extremely heavy. It was shallow, and I wasn't getting enough oxygen in. I felt hot and cold at the same time. I felt sweaty but I needed to shiver. My throat felt dry and my head was spinning like crazy.

"Come on Liza. How many fingers am I holding up?" He asked, holding his hand up. But I couldn't even focus my vision on him for long enough. "Landon she needs an ambulance. Like right now."

My knee felt weak. I felt as if I was falling forever, but I stood up. And that when I knew I had fallen. The grip on my arms got tighter, and my head was rested against something.

"Woah, Liza!" Landon shouted. "Try and keep her awake, I'm calling the ambulance now." He instructed Jaden as he walked off.

"Come on Liza. Stay with me." He tried, lightly tapping my cheek to try and keep me awake and responsive.

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