Wanelle

21. Searching (rewritten)

Chris stared at himself in the mirror two months and a week had gone by. He looked his worst if possible because his stubble had grown. His hair had grown and it looked messier. He was always kept. He had control over everything. Now, he didn't. Every time he looked through his window, he saw her reflection, an image of her smiling at him. All his imaginations.

His dreams were taunted with her beautiful and bright smile. He didn't know to take it as a good thing because he always woke up the next morning feeling a lot worse. He threw on a white shirt and grabbed his car key off the floor.

Maybe he deserved it. He broke her first. He thought.

" Hey, Chris, " Loretta rubbed the sleep off her eyes and stared at an already dressed Chris. The sight of her body made him feel guilty each morning. Every night he had sex with her, he imagined it was her. Even being too drunk, he never forgot her.

" I have something to attend to." he cut her off and walked out the room Briana had left for college and after so many attempts to get her back, it failed. She didn't want to talk to him, much less tolerate him. Theodore was a lost cause. He left and that was it. His family was separated.

He was separated from her.

The atmosphere of the place was dark and empty. No more love and so much brightness.

"Chris, Chris, " she stopped him.

" I wanted to get a new car, you know my old one is so ol---"

"Get whatever you want and leave me alone." he walked out and went to the one place he'd always went.
Kiara's place. He hoped she'd show up so he'd see her even from a distance. He had began to give up, slowly losing hope.

The parking lot was just empty as usual. Kiara would come out her car and walk home. It felt like he was stalking her. He was a coward. He thought. The same thing each day. He needed to find her, even if it meant looking after her from a distance. He'd be content and his guilt wouldn't eat him alive. He didn't know where to find her
No contacts, social media. Everything he knew wasn't of use anymore and it broke him. He wasn't there when she needed him the most.

His phone interrupted his train of thoughts. It was Bryan. The past few days and weeks were difficult and it was Bryan who kept him up.

"Hey man, " Bryan said excitedly.

" Someone's in a good mood," Chris chuckled. He'd been acting like a boy who finally got his crush to notice him. At least he was happy. A little brightness.

"Well yes, I'm in a good mood, I actually called to check how you're doing? ,"

" I still can't find her, She's turned into thin air. I can't find her, man, " Chris rubbed his sore eyes. Lack of sleep.
He barely ate.

" I'm sure you'll find her Chris."

" About our appointment on Tuesday, I thought of rescheduling it for tomorrow?," Bryan paused.

" Did something happen?, " Chris asked.

" I actually have to take my girlfriend out, " Chris smiled. Finally that jerk was in love. He just knew. With how happy he looked.

" Not a problem, man, I'll see you tomorrow. Bye"

He was going to find her. Even if she was in hell, he was going to burn with her. Because they were like fire and kerosene , so beautiful yet dangerous.

" I'll find you, Elle. I promise. "

He drove off.