F.R.I.E.N.D.S Hamilton AU

Ep: 19 The One Where the Monkey Gets Away

[Scene: Central Perk, Eliza is talking to a customer.]

Eliza: Okay, okay, I checked. We have: Earl Grey, English Breakfast, Cinnamon Stick, Camomile, Mint Medley, Blackberry, and.. oh, wait, there's one more, um.. Lemon Soother. You're not the guy that asked for the tea, are you? (Guy shakes his head) Okay.

Opening Credits

[Scene: Central Perk, Angelica enters with some mail.]

Angelica: Mail call, Eliza Schuyler, bunk seven.

Eliza: Thank you. (Examines it) Oh, cool! Free sample of coffee!

Angelica: Oh good! 'Cause where else would we get any?

Eliza: Oh. Right. ...Oh great.

Angelica: What is it?

Eliza: Country club newsletter. My mother sends me the engagement notices for 'inspiration.' Oh my God! Oh my God, it's Aaron and Theodosia!

Angelica: Aaron who you almost...?

Eliza: Aaron who I almost.

Angelica: And Theodosia, your maid of...?

Eliza: Theodosia, my maid of. Oh!

Angelica: (Takes it) That's Theodosia? Wow, she is pretty. (Sees Eliza's look) Lucky. To have had a friend like you.

[Scene: Angelica and Eliza's, Eliza and Alexander are eating Chinese.]

Alexander: Marcel. Bring me the rice, c'mon. Bring me the rice, c'mon. Good boy. Good boy. C'mere, gimme the rice. (Marcel brings the rice) Thank you, good boy. Well, I see he's finally mastered the difference between 'bring me the' and 'pee in the'. (Eliza ignores him) 'Bring me the' and- Eliza?

Eliza: What?

Alexander: Hi.

Eliza: Oh, I'm sorry. Oh, this is so stupid! I mean, I gave Aaron up, right? I should be happy for them! I am, I'm happy for them.

Alexander: Really.

Eliza: No. Oh, oh, I guess it would be different if I were- with somebody.

Alexander: Whoah, uh, what happened to, uh, 'Forget relationships! I'm done with men!' The whole, uh, penis embargo?

Eliza: Oh, I don't know. I guess it's not about no guys, it's about the right guy, y'know? I mean, with Aaron, it was safe and it was easy, but there was no heat. With Paolo, that's all there was, was heat! And it was just this raw, animal, sexual...

Alexander: Wait-wait. I, I got it. I was there.

Eliza: Well, I mean, do you think you can ever have both? Y'know? Someone who's like, who's like your best friend, but then also can make your toes curl?

Alexander: Yes. Yes. Yes! Yes, I really do! In fact, it's funny, very often, someone who you wouldn't think could-could curl your toes, might just be the one who...

(Enter the other four)

Angelica: Hi.

Alexander: (...Gets interrupted.) Hi!

Eliza: Hi, how was the movie?

Angelica: Wonderful!

Peggy: So good!

Hercules: Suck-fest.

John: Toootal chick-flick.

Peggy: I-I'm sorry it wasn't one of those movies with, like, y'know, guns and bombs and, like, buses going really fast...