F.R.I.E.N.D.S Hamilton AU

Ep 8: The One With The List

[Scene: Angelica and Eliza's apartment. Peggy, Angelica, and Eliza are there, discussing the night before.]

Eliza: Alexander kissed me.

Angelica: Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!

Eliza: It was unbelievable!

Angelica: Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!

Peggy: Ok, all right. We want to hear everything. Angelica, get the wine and unplug the phone. Eliza, does this end well or do we need to get tissues?

Eliza: Oh, it ended very well.

Peggy: Ohh!

Angelica: [getting the wine] Do not start without me! Do not start without me!!

Peggy: Ok, all right, let's hear about the kiss. Was it like, was it like a soft brush against your lips? Or was it like a, you know, a "I gotta have you now" kind of thing?

Eliza: Well, at first it was really intense, you know. And then, oh, god, and then we just sort of sunk into it.

Peggy: Ok, so, ok, was he holding you? Or was his hand like on your back?

Eliza: No, actually first they started on my waist. And then, they slid up, and then, they were in my hair.

Peggy/Angelica: Ohhhh.

[Scene: Alexander's apartment. Alexander, John, and Hercules are there eating pizza.]

Alexander: And, uh, and then I kissed her.

Hercules: Tongue?

Alexander: Yeah.

Hercules: Cool.

[Scene: Central Perk. Hercules, Peggy, Angelica, and John are there; John is showing everyone his new computer.]

John: All right, check out this bad boy. 12 megabytes of ram. 500 megabyte hard drive. Built-in spreadsheet capabilities and a modem that transmits at over 28,000 b.p.s.

Peggy: Wow. What are you gonna use it for?

John: [doggedly] Games and...stuff.

Angelica: [reading the paper] There are no jobs. There are no jobs for me.

Hercules: [reading over her shoulder] Wait, here's one. Uh, would you be willing to cook naked?

Angelica: There's an ad for a naked chef?

Hercules: No, but if you're willing to cook naked, then you might be willing to dance naked. And then... [rubs his fingers together]

[Alexander enters, distraught.]

Alexander: Hi.

Peggy: Hey, oh, so, um...how'd you make out last night?

Alexander: That, that is funny. That is painfully funny. No, wait. Wait, yeah, that's just painful

Angelica: Wait a minute. I thought last night was great.

Alexander: Yeah, it was, but...I get home, ok, and I see Julie's saline solution on my night table. And I'm thinking to myself, oh my god, what the hell am I doing? I mean, here I am, I am with Julie, this incredible, great woman, who I care about and who cares about me, and I'm like, what, am I just gonna throw all that away?

Hercules: You got all that from saline solution?

Angelica: We are talking about Eliza here. You and Eliza.

Alexander: Believe me, I've been dreaming about me and Eliza for ten years now. But now, I'm with Julie, so it's like me and Julie, me and Eliza, me and Julie, me and... [Eliza enters, carrying a tray]... Eliza. Eliza, Eliza.