Blind Love

Chapter 86 • Broadened Horizons

The steady ticking of the clock on one of the walls of the bedroom make me even more nervous and my palms become sweaty. JJ's quietly sitting next to me and she hasn't pressed me to elaborate on our subject matter. Instead of pretending I didn't bring this up, I exhale a determined breath and decide to just tell my wife. With my fingers nervously spinning my wedding ring around my finger, I work up the courage.

"Alright. I've been thinking. The adult entertainment industry makes certain . . . toys for women, right?"

"Yes," JJ softly replies.

"So do they make other types of . . . toys for men . . . to work with their anatomy?"

"Yes, they do. They have all kinds for different sorts of pleasure. What did you have in mind?"

I reach up to scratch a itch on my scalp that feels like it's covered in perspiration, "I, uh, I like the vibrations, but I was wondering . . ."

"Go on, love," she says, linking her hand through my arm and she fits her hand in mine.

"I don't really know what these certain . . . adult stores all have, but maybe stuff like for . . . like it fits around my . . . while we're . . . y'know."

"A cock ring?"

"Ha! Is that what it's called?"

She giggles, "Mhm. We can get one of those. Anything else?"

I swallow harshly, "Well, um, maybe something that goes . . . God, this is embarrassing . . . in . . . me in that . . . area?"

"Like a dildo strap on for me to wear? You wanna be pegged?"

"Peg-, bloody hell, that sounds like a form of torture."

"Oh they have BDSM stuff, too," JJ eagerly says and I laugh nervously.

"I think we should start small, love."

"Oh so like a butt plug?"

"Ha! Christ! A dildo strap on, a-a butt plug. These names are just-"

"Fun. They're fun, right?" JJ asks, squeezing my hand a little and I nod in answer. "It's all meant for fun, to spice things up for lovers, or a single person, to spark a new flame."

"I guess, yeah. We're lovers. You're my lover and I'm yours," I say like I'm reasoning to myself as if it's justifying this conversation and she hums in agreement. "So, would those things, the very basic things, be okay with you? For now?"

The silence in the room becomes even more deafening and it's like the clock on the wall has stopped ticking and time itself has stood still.

"It would be more than okay, Harry. We can try these new things, with lots of lube and be very careful, and if we don't like them, we don't have to use them ever again. I personally think it will be fun."

I turn my head in her direction, "You do? You're not lying?"

"I'm not lying. Cross my heart. I think this could be good for us, for our relationship. There was nothing wrong with it to begin with, don't get me wrong. We're just . . . broadening our sexual horizon."

I breathe out a laugh, "Yeah. And if we don't like them, we'll never speak of this again. Deal?"

"Deal," she startles me with a peck on my lips. "You know I would never judge or tease you."

"I know that, love, but I've never spoken a word about this to anyone."

"Anyone ever?"

"No. I very well can't go into an adult store with my mum or sister, or by myself. I already cause a scene just by being blind, so I can't even begin to know what they'd think. And if anyone would take me, I know Michal would tell Gem, who would then tell Mum and I don't need everyone knowing anything about my private life. It's been a few years that I've kept this."