Lost In Our Imagination 2: Not As Planned

52 - You Didn't?

February 2019

Livi's P.O.V

"Livi why are you up so early?" James asked walking in to the living room where I was watching the TV.

"It's not that early" I said looking over at him.

"Livi, it's 7 in the morning" He laughed sitting on the sofa with me.

"Oh, sorry" I smiled, "I couldn't sleep"

"What's up?" He asked and I sighed.

"I text Katie, she's coming over at 10 so I can talk to both of you, I have something I need to tell you two"

"Right okay... Do I need to be worried?"

"I don't know, can we just not talk about it until Katie get's here..."

"Livi you're really going to make me wait now?"

"James it's just easier if I can tell you together"

"Okay I won't ask, do you want something to eat now we're up?"

"Yes please" I smiled and he got up and made us both some pancakes.

"Thank you" I said before we started eating. We both got ready and before I knew it Katie was here.

"So, what's the big news that had to wait for the both of us?" James asked, I could tell he was trying not to worry but he seemed a bit on edge.

"I just wanted to tell you both before you found out some other way but Ben's back in London" I said biting my lip and Katie nodded.

"Ben's back?" James asked with no expression on his face, "Why?"

"He just wanted to come home, missed it here" I said not wanting to tell James why he was really here.

"Missed here or you?" He asked and I sighed.

"James please don't be mad"

"No I'm not mad, I'm just curious why he came back, I thought he loved his new house in America and his new job with all the money, with his fresh start, away from us"

"James, people can change their mind" I said and he laughed.

"Yeah, I can tell, I need to go for a walk" He said and walked out the apartment.

"So that went well" Katie said and I sighed putting my head on the table.

"I don't know what to do, I'm happy Ben's back but I knew James would be like this"

"Well you can't really blame him, you and Ben are very close, he's bound to feel threatened"

"Yeah, and he's got every reason not to trust me" I said looking up at Katie.

"What do you mean?" She asked slowly and I sighed sitting up.

"There's something I've been wanting to tell you but I didn't know how to so I guess this is the best time to do it" I sighed and she looked at me very confused, "You remember my trip to America back in September right?"

"Yeah, you went to stay with Ben for a week" She nodded.

"Well, about half way through the week we went to the beach to watch the sun set and we got talking and then we got on to the topic of me, Ben and James and then it sort of slipped out that maybe, possibly I did like Ben more than a friend..."

"Wait what? You like Ben?!" She asked shocked and I nodded my head.

"Yeah, but I could never admit it because everyone made such a big deal of it and I wanted to try things out with James but I always felt something for Ben"

"Livi why didn't you ever talk to me about this?"

"Oh no, I'm not finished yet..." I mumbled and she frowned, "Well while we were waiting for the sun set we sort of ended up kissing a bit..."

"LIVI" Katie gasped running her hands through her hair before clasping them together in her lap.

"And then when we got back to his it might have continued in to something else"

"Oh my god Livi! You cheated on James!"

"Yes I know, I know and I feel awful about the whole thing... I love James and I never wanted to cheat on him with Ben but when we were there on the beach everything just felt right and I wanted to be with Ben, without having to worry about seeing any of you the next day"

"Is that why you were so weird with James when you came back?"

"Yeah sort of... But it wasn't my fault it continued, ok maybe it is! Katie what do I do now though"

"Wait so is that why Ben's really here?"

"Yes, I maybe have accidentally told him that I was going to be with James as Ben wasn't in this country so Ben took that as move back and him and I might be able to give it a go! So Ben moved half way across the world, to America, to get away from me, and now he's moved back to be with me!"

"Wow, he must really like you Livi, he left his mansion of a house in LA to come back to London, where is rains 2/3rds of the year"

"Katie what am I going to do, James is going to hate me as soon as he finds out what happened in America, I tried so hard to stop him from believing there was something between Ben and I and now I've proved him right"

"Livi, James would never hate you, yeah he'll probably be pissed but anyone would be, you just have to choose which one you really want to be with"

"I have to choose? No, why can't you choose...."

"I can't tell you who to love, that one is up to you"

"But what if I can't chose?"

"You must have some idea which one you want to be with?"

"That's my problem, I love both of them, James is sweet, he's always been there for me and he's the first guy I felt actually cared about me, but Ben is new and exciting and really hot" I moaned running my hands through my hair.

"Okay so we don't have one we'd rather be with" She laughed and I smiled.

"Katie, I'm in really deep shit"

"Well that's true"

"Hey, you're meant to be helping me"

"I am helping you! You need to talk to James, before he see's Ben and he tells him"

"Yeah you're right" I sighed, "I will talk to him, just not today, he needs to recover from the Ben moving back news first"

"Well yeah that's probably a good idea" She nodded, "I should go, Brad's waiting at home for me, call me if you need to talk or anything"

"I will, thank you" I smiled as she walked to the door. James didn't come home for another 2 hours, but when he did, he seemed very calm.

"I'm sorry for leaving this morning" He said sitting with me on the sofa, "I know you tell me there's nothing with you and Ben but I think I'm always going to be jealous of him"

"Why?" I asked and James sighed.

"Because he got to be there for you after the car accident, he got to be the amazing guy who helped you settle back in at school and adjust to your life in London again"

"I wish it hadn't taken me so long to remember you, you know that right"

"I do" He nodded, "And I don't blame you at all for any of it"

"I'm sorry James" I said and leaned over and kissed him. Even though Ben had come back wanting to be with me, part of me still wanted to stay with James, because of how loyal he'd been to me all this time. How could I just throw that away?