❝ 𝙉𝙤 𝙇𝙤𝙣𝙜𝙚𝙧 𝙃𝙪𝙢𝙖𝙣 ❞ LONG HIATUS

: ̗̀➛GASP OF THE SOUL

"I know that I am liked by other people, but I seem to be deficient in the faculty to love others."
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      'To my dearest p̶a̶r̶t̶n̶e̶r̶ Chuuya,

By the time you find this, I'll have already left the
Port Mafia, I mean, you were there when it happened, so it shouldn't come as a shock to you.
I know, it's a tragedy! Oh, how you'll miss me
teasing you for your height and tacky hats. Alas, I have made a promise I absolutely cannot break, so I must bid you farewell. Perhaps you'll even gain my position! That is, if you can reach my level of intellect.

I am aware that dogs have a strong emotional bond with their owners; yet, as your master, I have one final command for you: do not look for me. We both know that I am the brains of the operation, and so attempting to sniff me out will be a fruitless endeavor. It would be best for you if you could just forget that I ever existed, which shouldn't be too difficult of a feat given the size of your brain in comparison to the size of your skull.

I doubt you'd ever read this letter. i doubt this letter would ever even see the light of day once i seal it into its envelope, chuck it somewhere and forget all about it. Perhaps one day, after everything has been said and done, I'll pick this up, flip through the pages once more, and think back on the good old days. I love you, Chuuya, and when all of the universes have provided me with sufficient reason to stop, sufficient reason to get away from it, I will. But until then, i've said this before, you're like a star. You're gravitating, and bright, you have so much life in you it's blinding.

And you're completely and utterly out of my league.

I should have realized this earlier. I should have. But I cling onto it. But I struggled to keep hold of it. I clutched to every piece of reassurance that you provided for me, and I held to this terrible, fucking foolish thing that is called hope. I hoped that someday, all of this would make sense. I hoped that one day you'd give me the answers I'd want to hear.

But no good things come for evil people.

And we both know I'm far from being a good person.

And one day, i'll look back onto this and laugh. Life wouldn't be the same. For both of us, life already isn't the same. You must be ecstatic right now. Happier than you've ever been. You are more content than you have ever been when you're with me. I am overjoyed for you. To provide joy to your life has always been my number one priority. But I guess that wasn't meant to be because all that ever happened was us fighting, making up, and then fighting again.

I want someone to treat you right because you deserve to be treated right. I want someone to cherish you because you're precious, unique, an absolute dream. You are the heat-haze dream that I wish had been real and that I could have kept with me for the rest of my life. All of the assurances that we gave have now been rendered meaningless, like cement that has been ground into powder and will soon be carried away by the breeze.