Calid - Isen
Bloke - Blyke
Fork - Arlo
Sharimp - Remi
Bitachi - Elaine
John: Wake up at 11:30, feeling like a bag of shit
Sera: Oh no
John: All my clothes are dirty, so i'm smelling like a bag of shit
Fork: Get a fucking washine machine you useless bastard.
John: Arlo, it's a song!!
Fork: Do I look like I give any singular fucks
Fork: You are blowing up my notifications at 3 in the motherfucking morning alright
John: Well uh
John: It's 3 pm across the world?
Fork: BUT WE DON'T LIVE ACROSS THE WORLD DO WE
Fork: WE LIVE WHERE WE LIVE AND I HAVE MY DRIVERS TEST TOMORROW SO-!!
Bloke: holup
Bloke: So you're telling us that you can't drive??
Fork: Yes, I can't drive
Fork: Legally that is, I can spin the car like a torpedo, make you vomit, and still get to the destination in 5 seconds flat
John: Are each of those seconds an HOUR LONG???
John; Do you remember the great Instagram Incident of two months ago???
Fork: Don't remind me
Cecile: What's the great Instagram Incident of two months ago?
John: Arlo was driving down the road with all of us in his car and Isen stuffed into the trunk
Calid: I still don't understand why I couldn't sit with you...there was a whole empty row!!
John: That row is for my snacks
Calid: But you didn't bring any snacks
John: And I can't have r a t s eating my snacks, can I?
Calid: BUT HOW CAN I EAT YOUR SNACKS IF YOU DIDN'T HAVE ANY
John: IDK OKAY THAT WAS A LIE I JUST THINK UR KINDA UGLY ALRIGHT
Cecile: John! That's so rude, Isen isn't ugly at all!
John: YOU WANNA GO
John: CATCH ME OUTSIDE ILL POUND YOU INTO THE GROUND
Sharimp: Send him to the ranch
Sera: W h e e z e
Sera: Anyway, continuing the story...
Sera: Elaine was making an instgram story and asked arlo to get in it
Sera: Naturally, arlo said no
Fork: Please don't continue...
John: Stfu bitachi
Bitachi: As the actual Bitachi here, please do not call others except for me Bitachi. It is very disrespectful to the honorous Bitachi name.
John: What in the actual fuck is wrong with you
John: I'm not even kidding here, like seriously, what is your problem
Bitachi: :< you smacked me and grabbed my face once
John: I sent remi to the hospital and she doesn't even care
Sharimp: I've actually been plotting a way to murder you for nine months now
John: What?
Sharimp: What? :))))
John: Anyway, other that that...
John: Sera may I tell the story
Sera: Sure
John: No actually you tell it, you tell it
Sera: Okay so then-
John: Nono I want to tell it!!
John: Wait actually you can tell it heh
Sera: Then-
John: I WANNA TELL IT
Sera: OH MY GOSH WILL YOU JUST MAKE UP YOUR FUCKING MIND BEFORE I TAKE AN AXE AND CHOP YOU IN HALF WITH IT
John: y-you can tell the story
Bloke: Sera's a dommy mommy I see
Sera: w h a t
Sera: d i d
Sera: y o u
Sera: s a y ?
Bloke: D-dommy mommy?
Sera: im gonna kill you
Sharimp: Blyke just hid in a bathtub, carry on
Cecile: Just tell the damn story okay
Sera: Okay okay so
Sera: Elaine asked arlo to record an insta story
Sera: Arlo said no, fighting ensued
Sera: And then John grabbed the phone, started a livestream, ripped off his shirt, and put the phone in his mouth
Sera: Then he drank five shots of expired cherry soda because he thought it was alcohol and yeeted the phone out the window with his phone by pretzel-kicking it out
Cecile:
Cecile: John, what the fuck
John: I was drunk!
Sera: IT WAS EXPIRED CHERRY SODA
John: Yeah yeah it expired and then it fermented and then it became alcohol!
John: Have you never taken a science class before??
Sera: *facepalm*
Sharimp: After John yeetus deletus Elaine's phone, she started screaming and crying and jerked the steering wheel and we ran into an electric pole and John stripper danced on it before getting shocked by the high voltage and falling to the ground
Sharimp: He was alright considering during the Joker fight I shocked him with 100x more electricity
Cecile: Honestly, I'm not even surprised at this point
I want waffle fries :3
Coming up next:
Bloke: Does anybody care to explain why Remi started crying and then chucked her phone into the trash can?
John: No. No, I don't care to explain because I don't care about you or Remi.
YOU ARE READING
the shit that goes on at wellston | chatfic TWO BABAY
Fanfiction"'SHRIMP.'" All Remi wanted was a nice place where the Royals could talk and chat, but of course, the UnO Cast are not exactly the easiest people in the world to deal with. #1 in Pens #1 in Arlaine #1 in Asslo Alternative title: druggies and smarty...
