Nothing but the Truth

Part 36 What Made Me Strong

I'll be honest yes I know I've said this before but words do hurt and I won't lie about that for as long as I could remember I've been called ugly, bitch, fat etc and always told by nearly everyone I've ever met I'm not good enough, not pretty enough, never gonna amount to anything. Most lads (Except Darian and other lads) look at me and tell some lass I'm with that she's prettier then me it hurts and I felt like I would always hate myself. Ugly is a horrible word you can't find no way to sugar coat it. Do you know what it's like to dislike yourself day in day out? Do you feel that pain inside your heart? If your answer is yes I feel you no one needs it in their life feeling like all they get is criticism and judgement. I've only had 8 people who are honest and true of heart my mum, my nan, Darian, Darian's sis, Becky, Ikra, Gareth and William those people are well and truly pure of heart. The nicest thing I've ever had said to me was from Darian and truthfully it makes me tear up everytime I think back on it "Shayleigh you know something I like you" I couldn't do nothing except smile at the floor "and truthfully you are prettier than her whose got the right to call herself your best friend" I honestly know that Darian was telling the truth and I'll take that to the grave with me. Even Darian's sister told me that she thought I was really pretty and I think that wasn't just bullshit it was the truth. Yeah I might be pretty not on the outside but as the saying goes its what's inside that counts and I'd take that over a caked in make-up rude, up their own ass bitch who thinks she's better then anyone else. I have a pure heart and a pure heart is better then anything. So yeah Bitchology made me a strong person.

Being a Bitch means:

I stand up for myself and my beliefs

I stand up for those I love

I speak my mind, think my own thoughts or do things my way

I won't compromise what's in my heart

I live my life MY way

I won't allow anyone to step on me

I refuse to tolerate injustice it means I have the courage and strength to allow myself to be me

So try and stomp me down douse my inner flame squash ever ounce of beauty I hold within you will not succeed and if that makes me a bitch so be it I embrace my title and am proud to be a bitch

Yeah I've been living by bitchology for nearly 18 years and it has helped me stay strong. But I think a few kind words, bitchology and Nothing But The Truth has saved my life more ways then you know.

I am who I am not who everyone else wants me to be and I'll tell you what I am a caring, honest, loving, friendly, challenge loving girl.

Be your own kind of beautiful.