When the stars are not in our way.

C26

After a minute of realization, tumayo ako atsaka nilisan ang restaurant.

Bumalik ako sa hotel pero hindi pa raw bumabalik si Bong.

Bumalik ako sa mga pinuntahan namin pero wala siya.

I called Ana and Peach even Levi para magpatulong sa pag hahanap sakanya.

Hindi ko na alam ang gagawin, alam kong matanda na si Bong pero hindi ko parin mapapatawad ang sarili ko pag may nangyaring masama sakanya.

"Why would you fucking bring up the past kasi!" I shouted at my self while were still walking and looking for Bong.

"Ma'am ok lang yan,mahahanap rin natin si sir just please calm down" Ana told me dahil sinasabunutan ko na rin ang sarili.

I am crying and keep blaming my self for what happened. Kung di lang ako tatanga tanga kanina edi sana kasama ko pa si Bong ngayon at nag shashopping.

Palalim na rin ang gabi at hindi namin nahanap si Bong.

We decided to go back to the hotel nalang at doon siya hintayin.

I told Them to take a rest pero tumanggi sila, sasamahan raw nila akong hintayin si Bong.

It's past midnight pero wala pa rin si Bong. That's when i told the security down stairs na wala si Bong at hindi namin mahanap.

They were about to contact the police director of Singapore pero pinigilan ko sila.

I just told them na sila nalang ang maghanap dahil kung makikipag coordinate pa sila sa mga Singaporean police baka mabalita pa ito at lumaki.

Sumang ayon naman sila at nag simula na sa pag hahanap.

Every 5 minutes kinocontact ko ang mga security kung anong update pero the same parin ang report nila,they can't find him.

It's past 2am and one of the security called me saying they saw Bong on the river side drinking and ranting.

Nag sisisigaw daw ito at saka itinutungga ang alak.

They also told me na they keep on convincing him para sumama na at bumalik na sa Hotel pero ayaw niya.

"Jun wag niyo na muna pilitin, hintayin niyo nalang ako jan, papunta na kami. Wag niyo lang hahayaang umalis ha" saad ko na mejo naluluha nanaman.

Ano ba tong ginagawa ko kay Bong? Feeling ko sinisira ko lang siya.

Should i continue being with him? Baka pag pinagpatuloy ko pa ito mas lalo siyang masira and i don't want that to happen.

I don't want to ruin him.

We reached the river side Jun told us at nakita ko rin agad sila.

I first approached Jun para itanong kung ano ang kalagayan niya, i don't want him to be surprised again na andito nanaman ako.

When Jun confirmed na mejo ok na siya that's when i slowly approached him.

Ready na ako sa kung ano man ang lumabas sa bibig niya ngayon.

Ana also signaled all of them na lumayo na muna para makapag usap kami ng matino at maayos kung ano man ang gusot saamin.

I slowly touched his shoulders and he looked at me. And he just smirked bago uminom ng beer.

"Ano pang ginagawa mo dito "Mrs. Carpio"? You should go back to the Philippines baka hinahanap ka na ng asawa mong mahal na mahal mo. Na hindi mo kayang kalimutan kahit kasama mo ako! Yung asawa mong napaka simple lang!" He shouted.

Wala akong magawa kundi ang umiyak nalang.

I held his hand pero binawi niya ito. That's when i knelt infront of him.

"Love please, h-hindi ko sinasadyang i bring up ang past, love please believe me" saad ko habang humahagulgol na.

He's not even looking at me, nakatingin lamang siya sa umaagos na tubig atsaka tinungga ang beer.

"You know what Sara, i believed in you a couple of times, i trusted you maybe a hundred times already, i-i even forgive you a Couple of times. Pero bakit? H-how can you? Paano? " he said na parang paluha na rin.

"H-how can you not forget your ex husband? Andito naman ako Sara, pero bakit laging siya ang nasa isip mo? I am starting to think if totoo ngang ginamit mo lang ako para kalimutan siya. Pero hindi eh, you you cannot forget him" he added at this time i can sense na he's also crying na.

"L-love i did not use you, sinagot kita dahil mahal kita. It's it's just an accident na nabanggit ko siya ulit kanina. I-I didn't mean to compare you to him Love. And i will never compare you to him dahil iba ka. Mag kaiba kayo. I -i feel safe when I'm with you love. I-I feel at home when I'm with you. Just love please forgive this one" i begged him.

I tried to hold his hand again for the second time pero binabawi niya talaga ito.

"You exist in my world in a way that no one does Love, you are so so special. Walang ibang papantay sayo mahal ko" i said while sobbing.

I am now kneeling and begging for him to look at me but he doesn't.

"Before ,I wonder how it feels like when someone cares about you, when someone wants to hear about your exhausting day. Kasi i did not experience that with my ex lovers. But thanks to you i once did. And i admit it feels addicting. But too bad ,our souls shared the same song it's just our hearts that didn't want to harmonize with each other." He said still drinking his beers.

As soon as i heard those words coming out from his lips mas lalo pa akong naiyak.

"I'm so sorry Love, i know nasaktan nanaman kita so kahit sa ayaw at sa gusto ko i will let you rest for a while pero tandaan mo, I'll never get tired of waiting because i know you're just hiding behind your clouds , you're just afraid to forgive me that i might hurt you again. But when time comes that you are finally healed, i-i will still be here loving you completely, restlessly, u-unconditionally, even you are just mine in an ever indefinite way." Saad ko habang nag mamakaawa paring lingunin niya ako.

"Enough with your explanation and sweet talks Sara, I'm done hearing those. I am a museum full of art but you had your eyes staring at that plain canvas!." He said before standing up.

"And for the last time Sara, thank you for showing me what love is not. I'll treasure it a lot!" He said bago umalis ng tuluyan at iwan ako.

Ok pa naman ata kayo noh? Hahahha goodnight