Shawn: I am strong! I beat Wally at arm wrestling!
Grant: Anyone can beat Wally at arm wrestling!
Wally: Hey-
\\
Sammy: Norman annoyed me today so I told him that I can't wait to see what he has planned for our special day tomorrow.
Jack: There is nothing special about tomorrow.
Sammy: But there is something special about watching the color leave his face as panic takes over.
\\
Wally: Hold on! I'm having one of those things... a headache with pictures.
Grant: What the fuck?
Sammy: They're having an idea.
\\
Wally: The best part of an oreo is the cookie part, not the frosting. Deal with it.
Henry: Darkness without light is an abyss. Light without darkness is blinding. You cannot have a coin with one side.
Shawn: YA! DUMBASSES! 'S JUST A FOOKIN' COOKIE!
\\
Wally: Who wants to make fifty bucks?
Shawn: How?
Wally: I need someone to take the fall.
Shawn: What'd ya do?
Wally: I can't tell you. Yes or no, no questions asked.
Sammy, from the other room: Oh my god.
Wally: ...
Sammy: OH MY GOD!
Shawn: Make it a hundred.
Wally: Deal.
\\
Norman: Why did you guys dress up as each other for Halloween?
Wally: Sammy is the scariest thing I could think of!
Sammy: Jack told me I should pick the dumbest costume possible.
\\
Jack: Norman, have you seen Sammy?
Norman: I'm not seeing Sammy!
Jack: ... What?
Norman: What?
\\
Abby: Be careful!
Joey: Always am.
Henry: Respectfully disagree.
YOU ARE READING
BATIM Oneshots ig
FanfictionCOVER NOT MINE Oneshots of any batim characters. I (mostly) do not care what pair of people you would like, what setting, AU, or anything. this is all creative freedom writing practice. Ask what ever you would like to see written! Fluff Angst This s...
