Marina one shots

A little therapy session because god knows i need it

Hey guys so I had a very very very shit day and I can't really talk to my parents because they are parents and they don't understand and before y'all start saying that I need to try and try to explain to my parents I already did they told me I should change and that I need to stop being so fucking sensitive and I need to change so that people like and stuff like that. So now I don't open up to my parents at all so that's great.

So my supposed friends have been making me feel like shit for the past six months and I don't know if it's me or it's them. Y'all know that ring on Reddit right where people tell them what happened and they ask if they are the asshole or not

So I need y'all's support and advice. Would y'all tell me the truth even if it means I'm wrong I'm totally okay with that. I just a friend at the moment

And if you guys also need someone to talk to my message on Wattpad are always open

So back to the story

So when I woke up I was in a very good mood and if you guys don't this I'm trying to lose weight and I'm losing 0.5 kg a week which for me is good and I'm building muscle so I'm very happy with that anyway.( I'll go off topic a lot so I'm already apologizing) I work I made myself some breakfast and made my coffee ofc and than I went to school.

So for you guys that don't how how my school system works I'll explain really quick so. I live in Luxembourg just a side info.

So here when you're twelve you go to lycée which for you guys is like high school and in your 3 year of high school you have to decide which section you want to go in. ( also they separate you in like École primaire which is middle school I think anyways they separate you from the dumb people, not smart but not dumb people, and the smart people that's how it works here) so I chose economics and stuff like that because that section is the best option if I want to go to university later and I have all the doors open.

So with the end of explaining that. I have a little entreprise and my group which is my friend group they make me feel like my opinion doesn't matter and every time I want to say something they say shut up and than when I'm quiet they ask me why I'm quiet so that makes no sense.

And than at the end of the day I had gymnastics and we where playing handball. ( I was a soccer player) and I'm the most athletic person in my class and I also hate losing. Anyway we were having a match and I was the goalkeeper and I sprained my ankle and the teacher came to me and asked me if I'm okay and she than went to search for ice and when she came back I put the ice on the bench and she said " oh are we playing football you're faking it" and she ignored me for the rest of the hour and now I have a sprained ankle.

And I have been feeling a lot like my 11 year old (I was suicidal at 11) I'm diagnosed with depression, anxiety and ptsd. I also have a self harm addition and the most I could stay clean for was 4 months. And now I relapsed again. And the exam sessions are  not the best.

I feel like the world would be a better place if I wasn't here and I feel like everything I touch it burns down. I'm so hard on myself and I'm constantly feeling like I should just end it.

I'm sorry if you guys are lost. I do appreciate if you took your time reading this. Once again I'm sorry for the rambling