cursed⭐︎ᵐⁱⁿˢᵘⁿᵍ

thirty seven

"Are you hungry?" Minho asked me as he headed up to the kitchen.

"Not really."

"But Jisung you hadn't had a proper meal yet, I'll cook you something."

I shook my head no but it was too late. He began making some ramen. I hurried to the kitchen and sat down, defeated.

He made two portions and gave Bbama some water hence he showed signs of thirstiness.

I thanked him and ate everything up, maybe too fast— I finished it in under five minutes.

"Slow down, Ji, you'll get sick."

I didn't care about that but quickly regret washed over me, the disgust settling in and suddenly I felt the need to empty myself.

That happened a lot, especially because I had this weird habit of eating too quickly. Nonetheless, I still felt bad.

But I was clean for so long..

"I'll go take a shower."

Minho nodded and continued his meal.

I rushed up the last steps towards my bathroom, quickly opening the lid and throwing all my insides out. I turned the water on so I wouldn't make too much noise, hoping Minho hadn't heard that.

He had just made you food. Why are you being so ungrateful?

I kept puking until there was nothing inside of me anymore, weaknesses taking over my body.

Nausea kicked in as I felt a taste of stomach acids inside my mouth, making me sick all over again.

I flushed the mess in the toilet and hopped in the shower. The water was burning my skin yet it was so pleasant that I wanted to be sucked alive by it.

It felt so good, the way it stung. I loved that feeling.

I wrapped a towel around my waist and left the bathroom through the door that lead to my room. Minho was still downstairs so I quickly grabbed some clothes and went back inside.

Fifteen minutes passed, I have to wait for at least fifteen more until I can brush my teeth. I thought as I remembered reading an article about how unsafe is to brush your teeth right after vomiting.

I put on a white oversized t-shirt, complimenting it with some black sweatpants and scrolled on my phone while opening the little window on the wall.

The temperature outside wasn't the highest but the sun showed its rays as it creeped out from the horizon. It was beautiful outdoors.

The phone screen was pretty cracked and it needed to be changed but I couldn't be arsed to do that for now.

"Jisung, you alright there?" Minho shouted while he climbed up the stairs.

"I'm okay." I answered, not sure of it myself, through the closed door.

"I have to go home for a bit but I'll come back soon, is that good?"

"Yeah, you don't have to come back if you don't want to though."

He said that he wanted to and left. I opened the door to my room and observed how it was now magically tidied. The bed was neatly done, there were no cans laying on the ground and my desk was cleaner than ever.

Minho.

I furrowed my eyebrows as I rushed back to the bathroom to brush my teeth and close the window.

It was around evening— six o'clock judging by the rays of the sun that were slowly losing their light.

My cracked phone screen lit up when I received a message from no one other than my best friend.

[Minho]: don't kill me but we're going out tonight on a car ride. Dress comfortably and be ready in two hours🩷

I stood there in awe, trying to process the events. Car ride? Late-night car ride? With Minho? Tonight? In two hours?!

But why?

I didn't want to go. I didn't want to leave the house, I had no energy to get ready. Even though he said that it was a car ride which meant no contact with other humans, just the two of us, I wanted to at least look presentable.

Why couldn't we just stay inside? I psychically could not go. Not after the previous circumstances.

However, I had no choice but to hang out with him.

I put some light makeup on; such as concealer (to hide my eye bags), eye shadow plus slight brown eyeliner and lip gloss. I couldn't go outside looking like a rat that had just woken up after hibernating for a year.

This whole procedure took me about half an hour since now it was almost seven. I opened the closet and looked through it for nice clothes, other than what I was already wearing.

What am I going to wear?

I desperately dug through it as I picked up every single cloth I owned, unsatisfied at the sight. It was just like last time, on our first hangout— but this time I didn't have an actual reason to stress about how I looked.

Only Minho was going to see me, no one else. Yet that made me feel more self-conscious, I wanted to look somewhat good.

Time passed away so quickly that it was now almost eight. I panicked and decided to wear some black cargos with a kaki t-shirt.

Minho made me confident about my scars, I could freely have them in the spotlight now without feeling ashamed. Of course, only the healed ones.

'They are beautiful.' he said.

'Why care about what others say?'

Maybe that was his mindset, but not mine. Nonetheless, I was determined to get better so I chose to trust him.

I decided to wear a jacket instead of a hoodie since I could get hot later on.

"Where are we even going?" I mumbled to myself while rushing downstairs to give Bbama a last peck on the head before tying my shoes and leaving the house, locking it.

Minho was leaning on his car waiting for me. When he saw me, don't know if that was just my imagination, but his eyes lit up as he opened the passenger door.

"You look nice."

I just nodded and hesitantly accepted his compliment.

He chuckled and sat down in the driver's seat, starting the car while I buckled my seatbelt.

"So, are you going to tell me where we're going and why?"

"Nope." he said as a smirk crept on his face.

"Oh come on! We are not doing this again!" I whined out.

"Just driving around. Maybe we will or not stop by a McDonald's to get something. Maybe a walk on the beach. Who knows?"

"Minho!"

He said that I have to be patient. Man, fuck patience! I wanted to know the reason I had to leave the goddamn house in the middle of the night. Well, not really since it was basically evening, but my point was still standing up.

"You'll like it. Tonight will be fun, I promise." Minho smiled.

I chose to trust him, as I always did and always will.