The Limit (Sebastian Vettel)

38. Coping Mechanism

Lily could feel Seb's eyes boring into her as the drivers sat listening to Michael Masi at the briefing on the Friday evening.

So far she'd managed to avoid him since arriving in Japan two days earlier, but seeing him now had been unavoidable.

Neither of them had reached out to the other since the night they had fucked. Lily felt too embarrassed by how she'd let him use her, and only Seb knew why he hadn't got in touch with her.  

Lily supposed that he had no reason to. He'd fucked her to punish her, and now he was done with her. 

She knew she should be listening to Michael but she couldn't help her mind drifting off to that night in Sochi.   It had been a punishing, angry fuck, but it had without a doubt been the most amazing, satisfying sexual experience of Lily's twenty six years.

Finally the briefing finished.  Lily got to her feet and made for the door.  She wasn't in the mood to make small talk with the other drivers.   She wanted to get back to the hotel so she could at least try to sleep. 

She was exhausted, yet she knew she'd spend the night tossing and turning like every other night.  In fact, the last night she'd slept soundly was the night Seb had fucked her. 

"Lily!"  She turned and saw the man himself running towards her. "Lily wait up!"   She sighed.  She guessed she had to face him sooner or later, so she might as well get it out of the way.  She stopped and waited for him to catch up.  "Hey, how have you been?"

"Getting by," she replied dryly. 

"I mean to call you, but I thought maybe you wouldn't want to speak to me."

"And why's that?"

"Why's what? Why did I mean to call you? Or why did I think you wouldn't want to speak to me?"

"Both."  They made eye contact.  Lily noticed how his eyes had gone back to their usual sapphire colour.  The anger was all gone.  Was he actually blushing a little?    His face certainly looked a little red. 

"We need to talk."

"Why?"

"You really have to ask that?"  She knew full well he wanted to talk about what had happened between them.   She wasn't stupid, but sitting down with a cuppa and rehashing everything wasn't what she wanted or needed. 

"Look Seb, it happened.   It is what it is."   He looked around, making sure no one was looking, before grabbing her hand and tugging her into a gap between two of the hospitality buildings. 

"I can't stop thinking about it," he admitted.   Lily's heart began to race. What did he mean by that? "I was a complete asshole. I'm so sorry for my behaviour."

"You were angry. I get it. I ruined your race." He looked tortured, which was making Lily feel like shit. Had he not enjoyed it as much as she had?

"I was, and you did, but I should have talked to you about it, not..." His voice trailed off.

"Not fucked me into next week?"   He definitely regretted it didn't he?

"Lily," he groaned, raising a hand and brushing her cheek with his fingertips.   "I never wanted our first time to be like that."

"Our first time? Bold of you to presume we'll have another," she blurted out.

"I was hoping there would be," he told her honestly.   "Have dinner with me.   Let's get to know each other properly.   I really like you Lily.  You know that, you've known that for ages, and I think you like me too.   Life's too short to keep playing these games.  Get to know me, let me know you, and let's see where this goes.  We're good together.   What we did....it wasn't how I'd wanted it, but it was amazing Lily."