I want to be an idle teen.

43. Intimate conversation 1

⚠️Bad language for kids ⚠️

As the tiger walked out of the shower and looked at the mirror, he couldn't help but stare for a bit.

Just a day ago, he showed his employers and partners the scarring across his abdomen. Scars that still hurt to look at.

Fingertips trailed down the said, as he stared at the fogged up mirror, his bare body staring back at him.

Perhaps it was just his own brain, perhaps it was his perception, warped vision, but he couldn't even look at them for longer than five seconds.

That was why, whenever touched there, he would feel extremely uncomfortable. And any time he dressed, or even had his wounds checked out, he'd have a small freakout inside of his head.

His main issue right now was the fact that he was afraid. Afraid of the fact that he could be described as damaged goods, scarred and skinny, frail and abused body really isn't something to awaken desire in people. So how exactly would his partners like him if he were to do anything...like undress in front of them.

It was a thought he didn't have until yesterday. But it was one that hit him like a damned brick.

If this relationship went far enough, he would probably undress himself in front of the two. They might even undress him. So, how was one to go about that?

He was not only insecure about how he looked naked, but also inexperienced. For God's sake, his first kiss was Dazai .

He did find himself, sometimes, indulging in his own touch and bringing himself ecstasy, he wasn't going to deny that .

But he felt like doing that with someone else would be a lot more difficult.

So, he decided to do this. Just stare at himself. Find perfection in the imperfections.

He supposed that having a lithe body wasn't that bad. Besides, he wasn't as sickly skinny as when he joined, so that was certainly in progress.

The scars themselves only covered a medium sized chunk of his stomach, so he could deal with that.

The real issue here was.... what to do in sexual situations. Even just makeout sessions. He is sort of confused about how it'd work, between three people. He didn't want to leave either of the men out once they did it.

Perhaps giving them both equal access to his body? Still, he didn't want to just sit there dumbly and give them the lead.

It would feel like he wasn't even trying . And he really did want to try, even in that department.

Sexual intimacy was strange to him. People liked it. And the gratification after an orgasm was pretty good. It made him stop thinking. It made him go numb for a few seconds.

But right after, he'd feel both immense guilt and disgust with himself. For no present reason.

Should he communicate that, before they do anything?

Probably. The two don't seem to be in any rush though, luckily. He, though...maybe he would like to do some stuff in the near future.

He got out and grabbed his clothes, that he previously laid out on the bed. Dazai and Chuuya were currently making popcorn for their marathon, which Atsushi's decided to be one of thriller and slasher films, simply because of the adrenaline rush that horror could bring if jumpscares and chases were done well enough.

The clothes themselves were simple enough. More cozy and less out there. A pair of sweats, gray and a simple hoodie, also gray. Since the night was particularly chilly, he decided against no socks and also grabbed one of those from the drawers.