Fait à la Perfection

10

"How have you been sleeping Hermione?"

Hermione looked at her therapist.

"Um...I-I haven't been sleeping."

"When was the last time you slept?"

"Two days ago," she murmured.

"How much did you sleep?"

"An hour, two hours..."

"Nightmares?"

She breathed heavily.

"How are things going with the kids?"

Hermione scoffed.

"It's like three days go well and then everything goes up in flames, Lily is back to crying all hours of the night, Henry is back to throwing his tantrums and James...James is just—"

She got up and went into the kitchen. Grabbing things to try to ease up her anger.

"Let it out Hermione," he said.

Hermione looked at him confused.

"Let it out, what are you feeling towards James?"

"I-I don't—"

"Tell me the truth, what does he make you feel?"

"Angry!" Hermione snapped, "I-I-I had a good life before all of this! I had a clean house! A quiet one! And ever since he came with his siblings! He just instigates and then undermines me! He just—he's so—he's infuriating! He just—I can't deal with him!"

She threw a bowl down. It clanged loudly as it bounced on the counter.

"He's—he's insufferable! I don't want him here anymore!"

She realized what she said.

"I-I don't know...I don't know if I'm a good fit for them, if I'm a good fit to be a mother..."

It pained her to say that.

For the longest time she always wanted to be a mother.

"When did you receive the news?"

Hermione looked at him.

"What?" She whispered.

"My wife was infertile, so when did you receive the news?"

"Eighteen," she whispered, "when I was...fifteen, I was in a bad accident...I almost died and...all my organs were injured during the incident—I...I got pregnant a few years later and...I lost the baby...that's when they told me I had too much scar tissue and I would never be able to conceive."

"Who was the father?"

She shrugged.

"Some guy I hooked up with...no names exchanged...I didn't even see his face...I was pregnant for like three weeks when I was in my kitchen and next thing I knew I was in the hospital having a miscarriage," she sniffed, "I didn't even know I was pregnant until my doctor told me I was suffering a miscarriage..."

She wiped her eyes.

"Did you ever want to be a mother?"

"Always," she whispered.

"Why?"

Her jaw clenched almost immediately.

Christmas morning was the best day of her life. She was shaken awake by her father. She beamed when she saw him dressed in a Santa costume.

"Santa?" She giggled.

"Hello young lady, I am St. Claus."

She giggled again.